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You look at her – the way her lips move when she speaks, the way her laugh sounds so joyous. That one special girl that’s always been different from all the others, the one that, you just know, will make everything all right if you could just be with her.
What can you do to end up with her?
It is this question that gets most people off their butts and start looking at how to be good with women. They want that special girl. The answer to their perceived problem though is not a simply cut one; to be good with a specific woman, you must be good with women in general. Getting the woman you want means you must know how to interact with women as a whole and know how to get them attracted to you, and getting good with women in general often means becoming a lot more willing to meet and explore new girls. In order to succeed with that one special girl, you must interact with other girls first.
Everyone loves to make new friends. Friends provide comfort, are there to experience the good times with you and will help you when you need them. Friends also introduce you to their other friends, which include the type of woman you desire. The true masters of networking can build up and manage multiple social circles with thousands of people in them, ensuring that they are never wanting for company. With a little practice, you can master how to build a social circle, allowing you to meet plenty of new women consistently.
A Social Circle From Scratch
You need to start building your social circle somewhere, and the best (and only) way you can do that is to go out and meet people. Your very first contact can be found any way possible – through existing friends, through co-workers, even going out and talking to someone on the street! The main idea though is to transform this contact into a friend by getting to know them and connecting with them. You may ask, “how can I connect with them?” It may seem daunting, especially if you have no experience meeting people on a regular basis, but turning a stranger into a friend is much easier than you may expect. The simple fact that you’re not trying to attract them sexually makes this much easier for you. All you need to do is be friendly and show interest in your contact. Smile and make small talk with them until you find something they’re passionate about, then allow them to talk about their passion for as long as they want. Everyone’s favourite topic is themselves, and simply by allowing them to talk about themselves and your being interested in them, will immediately raise yourself in their eyes.
Over the last four years, the entire seduction industry and pickup in general has become increasingly mainstream. Reality shows have popped up that revolve around attracting women and a slew of attention has fallen on the seduction community, even going so far as to have an entire segment on Doctor Phil dedicated to it. Most importantly, people everywhere now have easy access to the knowledge on how they can transform themselves into a pickup artist.
The question is, has this widespread attention on the seduction community been beneficial to us as individuals or has it been detrimental to us?
A new Era For Men
There are certainly many things for us to appreciate in becoming a pickup artist. In no other time have men had such a concrete set of guidelines on how they can meet and attract the women they want. A few hours on the internet immediately gives men a basic skill-set which they can use at almost any time. It may not be the magic bullet that most of them seek but there is no doubt that the small changes that most of the seduction community advocates has an enormous transformative effect on these men.
Not only do men know what they can do to transform themselves, the seduction community has also helped men reinvent entire lifestyles and improve their general level of happiness overall. Pickup does not simply advocate improvements to a person’s outer game but also to their inner game. With the change of perspective that this offers men, using techniques which have had medical applications such as Neuro-Linguistic Programming and Spirituality, people everywhere find themselves completely changed, with a far higher level of confidence, comfort in their surroundings and a more optimistic outlook on their lives.
Everyone’s seen it when they go out – that group of people sitting together, making the most noise in the bar and seeming to have the most fun. The women are beautiful, the men are charismatic and you begin to wonder to yourself, how can I be in that party?
The reason people find groups like the one I just mentioned so attractive is because of the vibe it gives off. A group that people want to be a part of is one that has no ulterior motives other than just having fun in the moment. Anything can happen and people will just take it in stride because it’s simply another part of the adventure of their night. Creating the vibe is easy – just go out with no expectations and have fun! If your friends are getting down because they’re not getting any women, tell them just to enjoy the music, the jokes, the company and everything else that happens in the night. Before you know it, you won’t have a care for anything other than the fun that you’re having, and those outside your group will see it and want to join your party.
Like many people, when I first started learning about how to get good with women, I had no idea I was making as many mistakes as I was. These mistakes weren’t huge, blatant things about me that needed an entire overhaul – no, it was the small, subtle things that simply added up to make me the socially inept geek that I was. If I had known how to change theses small things back then, it would have completely transformed the vast majority of my interactions.
That’s why today, I’m going to give you five small changes you can make that will drastically improve your game.
Improve Your Game
Unless you live in the sunny southern hemisphere, you might have noticed something recently. The leaves falling from the trees, the sudden drop in temperature and the rise in women wearing more clothes. Usually you might think about hibernating during the cold months… but not this year. This year, you’re going to meet women during these colder months. Here are five ways to meet girls during the colder months of the year.
Gyms, Clubs, Classes
Realize that people still need things to do during the winter. A great way to meet people who share a common interest with you is to sign up for afternoon classes or attend clubs or activities like yoga. Attend something that you would want to learn anyways and you’ll be sure to meet people you’re compatible with, people who share a passion for the same things you do. There are many chances to meet people in these classes if you put a little effort. During group tasks, working in pairs or even just sitting next to an attractive woman as you listen to a lecturer, there is ample opportunity for you to run your game. Since these classes often take place over a period of time, you can reveal your personality at your own pace since you are pretty much guaranteed to see the same woman again at the next class.
Pickup lines are one of the most misunderstood, misused techniques of meeting and attracting beautiful women. All over the world, people have the misconceived idea of a magic “pickup line” that will cause a woman to throw off her clothes and jump into bed with you.
I’m sorry to tell you that that is probably not going to happen… but the lines do still have their uses.
Different people have different definitions of what a pickup line is. I consider a pickup line to be any memorized line or phrase that is used to elicit a specific outcome from the woman. Pickup lines do not always give you the intended response but they do achieve it with consistency once mastered. There are generally two types of pick-up lines that are used in different situations: the opener and the routine.
The Pick Up Line is Know As An Opener
The opener has a simple purpose to open a conversation with a girl. Ten years ago, the most common opener would have been “What’s your sign?” a pickup line that now permeates our culture. “I need a female opinion” is quickly becoming the new “what’s your sign?” but it serves its purpose of opening conversation. Anything can be used as an opener, even the universal “Hi”, but there is a purpose to using a longer, more complex opener. The reason that so many people use a pickup line as their opener is because the more complicated openers tend to get the women very involved in the topic, investing enough attention in you to continue conversation.
We’ve all seen the movies with The Man in it. I’m talking about the James Bonds, the Clint Eastwoods and the Indiana Jones. The hero of the story always seems to be the person we want to be – suave, confident and always having that witty response to get the woman. It is not that difficult to become The Man yourself. For those of you who have wondered about how to be the man that women desire, these are the qualities that every desirable man possesses.
Being A Real Man
What separates the men from the rest of the pack is just how big your balls are. Not literally of course but just how much pressure you can stand from outside forces without buckling. A real man is unapologetic about his desires. He wants women and he isn’t afraid of them knowing that.
How many times have you pretended not to be interested in a woman when really you were, for fear of “changing the relationship the two of you have” or for some other absurd reason? Never be afraid that the dynamic will be changed by your open desire for women. Your desire for women should not be something you are ashamed of and try to hide or cover up. You’re a man and you are inherently attracted to women. What a life changing revelation, eh?
You’ve just done your approach perfectly. The girl is beautiful and all her attention is on you as she waits expectantly for you to say something to her. You open your mouth, suave and smooth like James Bond when you suddenly realize – you have no idea what to talk about with girls. Sound like a familiar situation? It’s a question that many men ask themselves – how can they maintain a conversation with a beautiful stranger, one that will keep women engaged and emotionally invested as they get to know each other.
One thing to understand is that it is not so important what you say but rather how you say it. The delivery is far more important than the content. Consider saying “Hi, my name is John” very shyly, with your body all closed in, and saying the same thing except with your chest thrust out in a powerful voice. How you deliver what you have to say makes a very big difference.
Being Passionate When You Speak
The way to deliver something confidently and with strength is to talk about something that you are passionate about and want to talk about, and in fact this is what your aim should be in any interaction; to talk about what you want to talk about. When girls hear the conviction and excitement in your voice and realize you’re talking about something you love, they are being given an invitation into your world, not a world where you are trying to impress them or seduce them but a world where you are completely genuine, something that women find very attractive.
You have the personality. You have all the tactics and routines. You have everything you’ll ever need to seal the deal. Yet, unless you know how to get a girl’s attention, everything you’ve been working on will be useless. So here’s the question – how can you get her attention?!
What women, and in fact most people in general, are attracted to is value. If a person holds value, they usually hold the attention of the room as well. However, when I talk about value, I’m not talking about simple monetary value – value reveals itself in many other forms, not all of which are tangible.
One convention that is certainly popular among many people is that of “Peacocking”, or dressing in such a way as to attract attention from others. The term “peacocking” comes from the tailfeathers of a peacock. They serve no evolutionary advantage to the peacock, in fact being almost detrimental as they attract the attention of predators. Yet, the peacock is sending out a message to all potential mates out there – “I have this thing that is completely useless yet I’m still surviving strongly.” The peacock is essentially showing off its ability to survive despite such a detrimental trait. For more information about appearance and looks, read our how to look good for men article.
Standing Out Of The Crowd
Peacocking in people holds a very similar perspective. By wearing something outlandish and attention-grabbing in a place you wouldn’t normally wear it you will be conveying that you are capable of surviving in the social jungle even while wearing something that may potentially make you the target of ridicule by others. You stand out from the sea of other guys and as a result, women will be paying attention to you. That’s why some men look ridiculous but still get women.
A Good Social Circle
Another way that will definitely get you attention is your social circle. Think of it like this – if you were walking down the street, talking to Tom Cruise, you would definitely get the attention of women. You might wonder, “How can I use my social circle to get me attention if I don’t know anyone famous?” The key is to give value. If your group is the group being the loudest and having the most fun in the venue, girls will tend to gravitate to you. Girls want to be a part of the party, and if you are in the heart of the party, or even better if you are the heart of the party, then they will definitely notice you and want to enter your reality.
A Good Attitude
Your attitude can also help you can draw the attention of women. These women are constantly being complimented by orbiters and being held on a pedestal by guys everywhere. By revealing yourself to be a guy who is not looking to get anything from her and is not overawed by her beauty, you immediately show your value – a man who could possibly look after her and can be trusted to keep her safe should she choose you. Give her reasons to want to be with you in the way you act, both to yourself and others
These three examples are merely a few ways to show value out of the plethora out there. At a basic level, the way to get a girl’s attention is to stand out. It appears obvious but how many of us actually feel comfortable, stepping outside of what are considered “social norms”and having people paying attention to us all the time? If she is going to be paying attention to you, so are many others, and you must be comfortable with yourself regardless of who is watching you at what time and what you are doing.
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