If I was to ask you for a definition of bouncing, which one of the following would you come up with: jumping around in a padded room, denying people entrance to a club, or changing a venue or location with a girl? If your answer is the last one, you’re on to an important skill with women: if you take a girl from one location to another, and it could be as little as different corners of the same room, you are creating an emotional impact. Never underestimate the importance of moving around from place to place.
Stationary Guy vs. Motion Man
If you slip inside a girl’s skin for a minute (I know you want it) and picture yourself at a martini lounge, imagine meeting two guys. One will come over and start casual conversation. He will ask what you’re doing, where you’re from, what your hobbies are. The conversation will be friendly, uncomplicated, and it will go on… and on… and on. If you don’t excuse yourself to get a drink soon, you’ll still be there in 2 hours. (To avoid this, read about making every conversation memorable)
Same spot, same guy.
Now, the other guy just waves at you and motions you to come to him. He’ll then take a wild guess about your job, which leads into a conversation about your profession and hobbies. He will spice it up by deliberately misinterpreting your responses, or teasing you. Soon enough, he leads you over to a couch, where you can sit more comfortably, and when a break in the conversation comes up, he’ll take you to the dance floor, and afterwards, outside for a breath of fresh air.
Which guy is more exciting?
A shift in dynamic
It’s the second guy, because he plays with the dynamic of the encounter. Ever notice how a room changes when you spend some time with it? When you go to a place for the first, you’ll get a distinct first impression of the space. After three hours of making friends and getting comfortable, though, the room actually looks and feels different: more familiar, homely, cosy. This impression is especially strong if you spend a lot of time e.g. on the same sofa.
Visitors at a venue undergo that transformation, and you can work with it. If you meet a girl and soon move her to another corner of the place, another room, outside or perhaps another place altogether, you stir things up or even break that feeling of coziness and shelter. The dynamic between you two shifts. Just a minute ago, you were an interesting, but not too intriguing conversation partner. Now, it’s you and her: you’ve become a team, exploring a new setting together. It’s a little adventure: things are in motion! This is literally going somewhere – and you’re the guy controlling it!
Humans respond strongly to physical stimuli. I don’t need to rub an explanation for this in your face about the ancient times of hunterers and gatherers, we both know from experience that physical movement, a change of place, a new outlook stimulate us and awaken our spirit.
The right moment
However, you don’t want to do this right away. Notice how the second guy I described above opens a girl up with some light banter and gets to know her. You want to make her feel familiar and, most importantly, safe around you before you take her away from comfortable surroundings. The key is: she has to be at least equally comfortable around you, otherwise she will not agree to leave her “home zone”, with probably her friends in it, with you.
Your best bet is to be open about your immediate intentions: from the moment you open, she knows you’re talking to her because you find her interesting, so don’t tiptoe around it. When you ask her what she’s doing, the reason is that you’re curious about her. When you tease her, it’s because inside, you can tell that there is attraction (otherwise she wouldn’t be talking to you and asking you questions back) and you’re confident enough to play with it. When you take her to another part of the room, it’s because you like her and want to talk in a more intimate setting. Just say it out loud.
“Bouncing” means doing stuff with a girl rather than just standing there and talking. You start your interaction by chatting, but if you understand the importance of being active, you will soon infuse some action – and really, that’s all it is. The stirring of emotions through movement and change.