If the biggest problem that you’re encountering is how to make a girl want you, then you’re at the right place. It’s likely that you feel that women don’t usually like you when they meet you… and that somehow you have to convince them to like you in return. This simply isn’t true! You never have to convince anyone to like you. This fallacy has propelled men into trying to ‘win over’ women, as seen in so many Hollywood movies.
girl magnet

The general rule is that women are attracted as much as men to new people they meet throughout their lives. Its just that most women are used to being approached, so they won’t be as pro-active about talking to a guy they like. For men, its a different story. We must learn how to talk to girls!

They are used to being ignored by women, and that further propels the myth that women aren’t attracted to men. So with that frame of mind, they approach and converse with women with the “I need to make her like me” mindset. This is awful !

Assume Girls Want You

There is nothing worse than a person that is “Trying to make you like him!”

The first rule to getting someone to like you is to be at LEAST their equal in terms of status. A healthy relationship has both partners doing things for each other. One partner might work while the other raises the kids, one might cook and the other might build the deck and so on.

However, this is often taken out of context. If you’re at a bar, and a girl asks you to buy her a drink. She’s testing you to see if you’ll do as she bids. Why WOULD you buy her a drink ? The only context that this might be socially acceptable would be if the guy proposed: “hey, let’s get some drinks and then he casually bought hers.” By the way, if ever in doubt if you should pay or not when ordering something together… then pay.

Teasing and Flirting

The second rule of getting a girl to want you is to tease her! Teasing done right is flirting. If you’ve ever seen a cat jump viciously at a ball of string dangling from a height, then you’ll know how teasing works. It’s playful, fun, challenging and very addictive at the same time. Now some of you might not know how to tease properly, so I’d recommend you learn immediately. The best way being by reading the book Double Your Dating by David Deangelo, he describe exactly how to tease girls properly in a way that will build massive attraction.

If you want to learn how to make a girl want you, look at how women make guys want them. They dress up in attractive clothing, move in sensual ways, ignore guys, allude to your imagination and act aloof. Attraction is subtle, and girls seem to master the art. My best advice would be to befriend an attractive girl and pay attention to what attracts you to her.

  • damson

    I met this girl I admired so much. I made my intentions known to her but she told me she had a guy in her life. She admired me so much that, every minute, and hr we were always speaking with each other on phone. There were days she wild accept to my proposal and just days after that, she will say no. She hardly picks my calls again and even if she picks, hadly does she speaks so nicley again. Ihv developed so much for this lady and can’t let her go. Wat should I do?

  • Allison

    Okay, so I’m a girl and I somehow ended up on this site, I don’t know how, but I can tell you right now, girls may respond to you teasing or ignoring them, but you don’t keep a girl the way [which I’m assuming you’re not trying to do, since a majority of you just want in a girl’s pants]. So for the few that want to actually keep a girl, all you have to do is be nice. I know people say “nice guys come in last”. That’s not the case, douchebags come in last. They may have the girl for a short time, but they never stay together.

  • Owais

    Hey Yasmin, how rudely you commented,but whatever it’s your perception,i was a jokin:)

  • raiderboss_408@hotmail.com

    These blogs are just people’s opinions and past experiences. Really!! people, if you think this would help might as well claim your victim and give it a shot. Never compliment a girl because doing so, she earns her respect and you are giving her the right to do whatever she wants with you and first comes the worst, she’ll even maybe play hard to get, depending on the girl. Try fitting yourself in her her own shoes cause girls like guys that think with their minds and not with their penises. So, make her want you and teach her something she doesn’t really like to do or not interested in doing. Figure it out because it’s not all about looks it’s more about, adventures to all kinds of things.

  • Muhammad Bashir

    …Then try to make her jealous, walk around her, even if she’s with the other guys, with a fine looking girl better than her type..

  • daniel

    i like this girl but it looks as if she is dating someone. i don’t know if she is because i have some friends that know her and they say she isn’t dating anyone. i talked to her a couple times… but i didn’t talk to her since because i did something stupid ( accidentally, of course). and she said “that was retarded. please, stop talking.” so i did and avoided her eyesight ever since. please tell me what to do.

  • Yasmin

    Gentlemen i stumbled across this page ‘accidently on purpose’ lol. now having read all your comments can i just say how rediculous human being are! both sexes are continuously trying to find out what will make the other person fall in love etc bla bla bla…

    My advice is this…there is nothing that anyone else can say to you that will help you make someone else notice, like or love you. You meet the right person when they come along and the time is right. Some people like playing games, others don’t like any of that crap.

    So yes the best thing to do is focus on being you and being happy and confident with yourselves. As for this guy who said ‘women hate shy,nervous…guys’ how the hell would he know?

    If you are shy and nervous (and a nice guy some girl’s gonna see that and love that about you). If you’re shy and nervous (but deep down a real arse…well go get layed by some fat chick) then be the arsehole that you are and some girl’s gonna see that and love you too.

    Seriously just be yourselves and we’re not all completley unapproachable you know…Apart from me!!!…If you ever see me you better be: over six foot tall with broad shoulders, have a great sense of humour, be ready to pay for EVERYTHING, be extremely intelligent, sensitive and in touch with my feelings, 100% honest, charming, cheeky, shy yet the life of a party, loyal…only joking 😉

    Good luck and stop worrying and stop reading these stupid blogs!

  • “John Constatine”

    Aight men listen up & Listen good, “3” simple rules and real keys that will have you in heaven with gorgeous ladies in no time,…bonus 1st of all forget all these movie compares and money fraud books, I am the definition of what you would call “The Reject”, i was the guy in school who never had the best quality in girls, not even the ugly fat ones<…thats even worse right?! granted i am a 5"1 male @ 26 today, with a 7 month old now, "How"?! you ask…simple,

    Step #1 (State Of Mind) This little bastard wall is a womans number 1 weapon to hold against us men, State of mind is where..You know exactly what you are doing with yourself and know where you are going and what you want…of course we want to be "Huge RockStars" plan and simple, yet easier said then done! the matter is, "guy's get real" this is reality, so we must seek reality things, make use of a skill you know you have ..it can be anything, ("Crafts,Sports, inventions, Computer Tech etc.")
    Women love guys who have Realistic goals or skills they are good, @ and sorry being a porn star is'nt 1 of them !!!

    Step #2 (Be Emotional) Yeah you read this 1 right, Cry ..shed tears, even though "Sexist Females" state that "Your A Guy..Your not suppose to cry" Fuck that shit, your human as much as they are, so if you get soft during a movie, or your puppy passes away or simply a loved one leaves, Cry and cry hard, let her know you care, "How Does this effect a girl you say?"
    Women are the masters of Emotion, they are full of it, if you notice they use emotion on a daily basis, They even cry When "Justin Beiber" says a word @ the Grammy's, it's just a girl thing, Plus a man who crys shows a woman that you feel the way she does, ladies will get the picture you "Comprehend the same thing they see, hear, or do, this is a "Magic Key" so study it, Control it, Master it!

    & Last But not least
    Step # 3 (Security)
    This lil Key is hard for us men to create, build, or simply have…why? because they're are haters in this world that don't want us to succed, all the assholes, all the greedy, all the fakes that take our dream women succed with this tool, so as you may ask
    What is "Security"?

    Security is the mind of your life, "Maturity", "Abilities", "POWER" women seek Security in a man, you can be the shortist, ugliest man alive, as long as you got a mind full of safeness…your ass will have Jessica Alba in no time, yet it's not about mucels, <—that is no option, niether is your "Twigs & Berries" , it's all about…Treating her like a queen, maybe a car or some sort of transpertation, even if its a scooter, Ladies Admire men who can have morals on her behalf and respect her image and wishes, not to mention, she wants security in travel, & then comes the Big Boy of em all!

    "Money" you need to have some sort of job, Even if it's Raking yards, Babysitting, or simply working @ McD's, regaurdless of what you do in the day, she wants to have a man who labors for hrs., Ladies don't dig lazy men, if your woman is hungry, she wants to feel secure that if she don't have the doe, she can come to you for grub,
    You see what i am saying, yeah i understand there is a lot of "Stuck up Bitches" but that's cause they are so into themselves they don't know what they want, so don't let the loser girls bring you down, If you are a man in his early 20's late 20's go for your same age range, if you are older go for older women, this is simple guys, just another thing before i submitt this info.

    A little secret a friend of mine taught me throu the years, Sence of Humor is a huge impact on ladies, if you can make her smile then you already have her on que, because ladies also love a guy they can turn to in hard times or days, it's common sence, it's easy and it's a cure for a "hint," (Broken Heart), Another little tatic test that can get you a girl starting today even…. here's a test, My Email is on this comment, once you have done the eye to eye contact and got her concerned, simply walk up to her, and say (" I Bet If I Made You Laugh & Smile Can We Switch #'s") right away she will just automatically smile a giggle, once you hand out your number, she will say "I Didn't Laugh though" tell her "A Giggle Counts" she will chuckle more! so here are some other helpful tips, Good Luck 😉

  • jeyo

    just be patient dude..one day she’ll be craving for u, i experienced this “ignore and score” thing and it worked

  • matt

    ok, i need advice, i am in love with what was suppose to be my stepmom but shes in love with me to shes married to my real dad but im not of age yet wont be for 10 months
    shes 39 going on 40 but we know we are meant to be together, we got in a small argument but talked it through and shes still only in love with me and she told my dad shes not in love with him anymore but she has that caring love for him so i need advice………..

  • t-mercury

    arnt you a big man, grow up “player”, only one your playing is your self in the aint a real man game.

  • Jack

    My situation,
    I am in a situation that is really strange to me, as my friend wanted to end her relationship since November of 2011 but ended it in May 2012 and now her and I have gotten really close to each other, like we hang out at least once a week, talk every night on the phone or on facebook, and we hook up all the time, so it’s like we are dating but we arent. She has told me that she wants to be single for a while longer before we start dating, but that has me worried about her and what she is doing with other guys, and it makes me think that what I am doing with her (going out to places, tlaking, catching up to watch a movie or get some lunch) that she is also doing with other guys. I guess my question would be how do I show her that I really care about her and how do I shoe her that we should not wait and start a real relationship now?

  • Scott

    I wonder if the rules may be different in an Asian country….. I know that it works to just “be yourself” and be different in America or other “Western” countries, where girls want to see a confident individual with his own style and his own “goings on”. But I’ve lived in Vietnam for 6 years and I think here it may be different. I think VN girls see their “real men” everyday, the local man is often uneducated and a manual laborer if he does anything at all, and of course dresses poorly, has bad personal hygiene, urinates outside on trees or walls, etc. Whereas in America some PUA say, “be yourself” dress how you want, do what you want, have other things going on that are more important than the girl, and she will want you. I feel like if I dress how I want here, no matter how confident I may be, the girls aren’t attracted to that-because it’s too much like their local man (whom they don’t want) They see bums and laborers everyday. If they want a foreigner, they want someone who is intelligent, busy, and like to see this kind of man dress successfully, maybe shirt/tie? suit? dockers and a nice polo? They seem to want a traditionally western “handsome” looking man. Here (Asia) I don’t think they pay particular attention to individuality. They (the girl) don’t look at a man in terms of only herself and raising her status, but they view the man in terms of what her family would want and whether he will raise the status of her family. The man should look smart and look like he can take care of everybody very easily. Sure, if you hang out in bars or clubs, you’re bound to run into Asian women that are more “modern” and “westernized” and only they may appreciate a foreigner with his own “style” and be attracted to him because he’s a “man”. But a more traditional girl seems to be completely the opposite of the modern Asian woman. The traditional girl thinks that the “modern” Asian woman is a “bad-girl” for hanging out in bars/clubs and meeting foreign men. Also, with regards to local men, they are manly in a “Marlboro Man” sort of way. They can do manual labor/outdoors, they are scruffy, dirty, unkempt, manly workers who don’t look particularly good and obviously don’t give a damn what anybody thinks of them.(90% of the male society) So maybe this “vision” of manly doesn’t appeal to the traditional local woman, for the “manly” man cannot provide for his family and take care of the girls’ wants and needs. Whereas, in their eyes, maybe a “manly” man is the guy who sits behind a computer all day, works indoors, dresses to impress, and in this way is sort of the opposite of what the PUA crowd suggests when they say that women “want a man”. Is it possible that because we have different social structures with different norms and standards that the rules might be reversed a little? I’ve found women who respond to my “individual style”, but they are difficult to find in a country of followers and people who generally think alike for fear of being different, non-conforming and possibly alienating themselves from their peer/family group.

  • Petey

    I want to get a girlfriend so bad.

  • jdott

    cheers for all the comment they do at least make you feel better in yourself and most of the things people are saying is true but dont push your luck with a woman or you will wish u hadnt !!

  • T-man

    Belive …in your self have faith if she turns you down then don’t be sad and never talk to no one else keep going at it when a girl see’s that u don’t care that she turn u down and u never give up on finding someone and she see u talking to another girl and you guys hit it off …..when your done talking to outher girls and just walking around she will come ATT u 10 times harder I know I was a player I had so many and I’m alright lookin out of a room of 10 I can get at least 8

  • #1 AC/DC FAN

    Well i was also watching her body language.While she was jumping back and forth between well and no she started to bounce up and down.Then ending by saying no so then i tell her that i was yes was going to ask her out for coffee or something.Then she tells me that she doesn’t drink coffee and that she is pickie.Well that right there told me what i have to do.So tell her that i would ask her out for a drink but i don’t drink alcohol.And i get from her a mmmm ok so then i just at her and tell well ok i’ll see you later.And she says ok by and i turn around and walk out AND I DO NOT LOOK BACK what ever you do don’t look back.If you do that’s it it’s over right there.By doing this she will be looking for you to come back.Now when she told that she is pickle and i said that told me what i had do.Well i have long hair but what she doesn’t know is.That i’ve been thinking about cutting it so the next time she see me there well be no more long hair.So i know i got her interested so until next time.

  • #1 AC/DC FAN

    Ok you guys i got something for you all.There i thisgirl that work where i go and pay my light bill.Now i’ve never been that good at get or reading girls.So i’ve been doing some research on all of this stuff.So when i would go in there i would talk to her give her a compliment here and there.Well the other day i told myself that it was time to make my move.So i go in to pay on the bill and she is there.So i walk up to the window we both say high well i think to myself that i’ll give her a compliment.That i gave her once before.So i tell her that i like her ring.And she reply’s back with thank you.Now here is where it got interesting i jumped straight to the question.With out asking if i could ask her a question.Now by doing this 9 times out of 10 this will cache them off guard.And with this girl it did so i asked her if she had a boyfriend.Well to see her act the way i use to like stumbling over words jumping back and forth almost studdering.I’m running here i’ll continue below

  • Mike

    What’s up bro’s…plz comment if you can in anyway..I met this girl age 22 a while back and did a lot of stuff for her we’ve kissed before held hands or that shit but she effed around and went for another guy so I tried and did land up forgetting about her..she is a very flirty girl as I know.. a few weeks later she said she misses me. I did however tell her not to say that and she said it more often then after..she stays with another girlfriend of hers and this girlfriend has told her that I’m in love with this girl now so its kinda drawing the hole thing back..we do like each other and even I know there is plenty more meat out there..I’m not the guy who is apologetic all the time or to romantic or even says stupid things in fact I have the most gorgeous women as friends of mine..I do better myself all the time sports activities you name it. I do see her least once every week as of recently again..everyone knows we do like each other…the problem is do I leave her but then she’ll probably message me on fb haha…or do I actually tell her she should of been the girl I wanted?anything I have missed or needs explaining please ask. Thanks in advance

  • scruffmaster

    @justsomeguy, you said it perfectly and naturally I am that kind of guy but my sons mom took a lot ofconfidence and that fun serious playful guy outta me. It sux

  • scruffmaster

    I love this man, its absolutly true. Just like we tgink we want a lady on the street but a freak in bed and that they are good at it. Its same concept for women. And no I’m not good at picking up women. Well I have the massive potential for it but I always cut myself short and act all down and out. Not a good thing. If I carried myself like I usually do I can be successful, remember gentleman on the street freak in the bed. So to speak.

  • sora

    go for it. if she says no then u go back to how thigs wee b4. no isnt always permanant bro

  • colin

    Maybe she has the morals of a guy to be honest, maybe after you two hooked up she got what she wanted now has effed off? Wants other guys?

  • colin

    That is so true. ( this is for everyone) Women also like the chase as much as they like to be chased if that makes sense lol. Do not make it so easy for them. Once they think that they can get you whenever they want, they aren’t interested anymore. Show interest, but don’t make that one person your everyday priority. <- as Graham said. Don't reply to text messages so quick, wait like 5-10 minutes if you are just at home. Make them sit and want you to message them, don't ask them to hangout much or be pushy. Women want what they think they can't get. I'm not saying be a complete ass but don't be clingy either. You can make fun of them which isn't a bad thing, just make sure they know you are kidding around. Make them laugh and just be yourself.

  • jay Reynolds

    Just be your self and be persistent. Think of it like a quiz. Since she just came out of a bad relationship she is going to ask you a lot of stuff like ” Why should we be together” or “what do you really love about me or do you just like my body” so be prepared to answer them

  • justsomeguy

    The way to get a girl interested in you is to ask her questions about herself. Women are generally attracted to men when the man is interesting or doing interesting things. They like to observe you without it being known that they are checking you out. Women like to learn, don’t we all and if you can teach her interesting things, she will be rapt with attention.

    Proximity is the best “cure” for the whole “no-woman/no-sex” thing, the trick is to get them to stand still for a moment. but women especially want to be taken seriously for their brains. I know this sounds ridiculous, especially when some women are total air-heads, but consider this; guy sees girl, girl has gorgeous eyes, long silky hair, full pouty lips that do this “thing” that makes him crazy every time she smirks, she has an amazing body, literally you catch yourself looking at her TOO much, on an on. So…sometimes women don’t realize how gorgeous they are and that we men need them the way we need to breathe air. But they don’t want to be relegated to just a sex object, which is what men tend to do, objectify women sexually. Half of this is “society’s” fault because we use sex in advertising to sell everything, paint even. You can’t look at a billboard anywhere selling everything from shoes to paper-clips that doesnt have a set of tits next to it. The other half is our fault, because we want to bang hot women. The first is un-natural, the second is of course, totally natural.

    Asking a woman questions shows a few things; you are interested in her opinion (make sure you genuinely are, she will spot a fake), or you need her help with something(make sure it isn’t anything too heavy) everyone needs to feel wanted and useful and also it shows her that you value what is going on in her head and want to hear about it and not just what is going on between her legs. Asking her totally stupid questions out of the blue like “Jane?” – “yes?” – “why are you so beautiful?” may sound cheesy and stupid and unmanly, but she will giggle and blush and her brain will sort-of lock up and she will not be able to provide any better answer than “I don’t know” while she giggles and squirms in that girly way, which means you just blind sided her mentally and “off balance” tends to lead to “horizontal” in fairly short order and nothing helps to break down a woman’s inhibitions like pointless flattery, it gets the “juices flowing” and that is exactly what we want, isn’t it? If she answers boldy “because I just am” with a toss of her hair then you smile and quickly retort “YES YOU ARE” like you mean it. If she asks you back why you are so handsome, act all shy and blushey like she just pushed your goofy button and say something like “oh come on now you’re making me blush”. She will eat it up like mushy chocolate ice-cream.

    Say/do things like this; lean in from one side quietly and totally seriously, as if you are about to whisper a secret, while looking away from her tell her “you know, you really need to turn your beautiful down, people are starting to stare…” She will laugh and maybe even hit you, this is a sign that moar/better/hotter touching is in the future. When a woman starts to touch you casually, it generally leads to more specific touching, which is what we want isn’t it? Just don’t force it; once it starts to happen, don’t force the issue or try to rush things, you will only mess it all up; you cannot force the flower to open it’s petals, it must occur naturally or the flower is destroyed and we don’t want that do we? Ask questions, crack jokes, take her interesting places and show her interesting things, or suggest this as a way to lead her to the whole dating paradigm. Asking a girl for a date is a sure way to get shot down. Asking her to experience something neat with you builds fond memories. “Hey can I show you somethign really cool?” is much better than “hey will you go to the movies with me?”. In fact if you are anywhere “within her field of view”, in other words there is potential already, then don’t ask her to go out with you TELL her you want to take her out. So, not “do you want to go see a movie with me” – don’t ask – instead – “I want to take you to see a movie with me” or “let’s go see a movie together”. Make sure you already have one picked that you will both like. Be confident, but not pushy, be funny but make sure it’s natural, ask her the right questions at the wrong time, compliment her for absolutely no reason, like she broke something inside of your head(which is usually the case anyway).

    Use your big head first to use your little head later. Life is like a great meal and fine wine, it is best shared, try to share with her, it will likely lead to more sharing. Have fun.

  • ryan

    man i feel bad for y’all. stop being so scared. Don’t let these people confuse you. be a man and take what you want. if you get rejected move on to the next. damn. only way to learn is to try. You’ll be surprised what you pull when you feel like your supposed to.

  • emma

    you messed up by asking her what she feels about you.you should have allowed it go smoothly without you asking her,she will later on tell you without you asking her.its like not being sure of yourself,by asking her,you made yourself so cheap to her.don’t ever ask her or any girl how she feels about you.

  • Chris Calo

    I beg to differ!

  • reno

    been there, done that. none of this advice works.

  • brad pimplogoy

    yo dudes listen to what im about to say i use to think just like u guys,sweating over a girl how to get her to like me or keep er.1.guys the number one thing to getting girls is self confidaince,if ur not into u why should she be,now this doesnt mean be cocky thats a turnoff too.when u walk up to a girl act like u belong there,hit her with a one liner something to break the ice (dont brag about urself) tell her u like her company and would like it agian (9 out of 10 times this will get u a number)2.flrit flrit flrit girls like playful man,they want to have a fun time(light touching and petting goes a long way)if a girl has fun when shes around u then u have already won half the battle.3.okay guys this is the big one and no matter what any girls say its the dead honest truth,girls dont want to share.so if ur wanting a certain girl tell her u like her but also make it clear that u have many other choices(even if it isnt true)not only does it make her feel one of a kind,but it also shows her u want her but u dont need her 4.so the last step didnt work 4 u or u already had a girl and lost her,girls r very possesses use it too ur advantage dont moop around looking sad no girl wants a broken man,instead flirt and have fun with other girls i promise u ur ex will be asking her self why she every left u .guys i have alot more to tell u but my time is up 4 now so i hope help in some small way

  • Oz

    Hey guys. I’ve had the heart breaks til the point it put me on a drip in hospital near death cos we were going great. Teasing n foolin round but everytime I tried taking her back to bed she acted weird.

    I’m now with the most beautiful angel but just scared it’ll happen again.

    Like once I break off from the indifferent attitude towards em to completely falling it goes wrong. Is there a way to make a smooth transition??


  • the guy that saved your life

    ok this is a joke, actually the best thing to do is being yourself, if the girl doesent like you for who you really are, then shes not for you, she isent worth it trust me, I know. just be yourself, and you will get the best damn girlfriend for you out there. remember, there is alot ALOT of fish in the sea

  • Unknown

    I have this problem. I like this girl and i started to date her out for like a year and we both liked each other. i popped out this question to her whether she can be my Girlfriend. She did not answer to my questions. Merely just scratching her head. My best friend, admired her too and in the end, she got together with my best friend. Is it that i am not fit enough or just that i asked at a wrong time or am i wrong?

  • Amis

    wow, guys actualli use this stuff? Well froma girl’s point of view we want the unreachable…almost always, but its not a good feelin not knowing if that person will be there wen u need them, always questioning the stability is not good for a relationship. I mean the best thing to do is be urself, maybe go a little out of ur shell n out of ur comfort zone but not so much as to play the girl in question. Most girls like fresh and new and playfulness but at a certain point u wanna go above jus a game…n making it a game to begin wit jus sets u up to get heart broken wen u fall for the girl n cant keep up the game she fell in love wit

  • Chen

    ok, so i met this one girl like a couple year back in the days, i use to like her and -talk to her for bout a month or so. then we stop talking again, its been since for like a year or so that we havent seen eachother or talk. (now) she added me on FaceBook, we started talking again a lil not much but almost everyday on FB. so she asked me if i’ve fall for her or like her back then when we use to talk, i reply yes to her. then couple days after that, im kindof falling for her and i told her that too, but all she say was, why, when, where, how, and what did i do to even make you like me, so it waskindof sad for me to hear her say that. she did told me she have something for me inside, but untill i cuss out,.. and so i was thinking, should i say sorry to her and try again to make her fall for me or dont talk to her for a couple of days and then talk to her again,, or what should i do, please i need help..??

  • Sophia

    If only men realized that women can tell when you lie, cheat or play mind games. And believe me we will be doing it behind your back, we are just better at hiding facts, and we will leave you and find the one who doesn’t play games, lies or cheats, who gives us time, affection and who isn’t afraid of love. This is what happened to me and what happens every day to alot of my friends, guys act like they don’t care..thinking it will keep her around for a while, but she finds someone better who shows he cares and respects her. My ex’s are still missing me and trying to get me back… but I will never go back to a man who has nothing to offer me.. Advice to the men: Be Your Self! Trust, Honesty and Respect is the foundation to a loving relationship. If you like her, show her! Don’t take advise from all your single guy mates or ones who change their women as often as they change socks, find a girl in a happy long lasting relationship and ask her why she chose her man… and she will tell you: I am happy found a man who shows me every day how much I mean to him! 🙂

  • Jen

    Maybe being hard to get or putting a girl last in your priority list gets her attention, but it definitely won’t keep it. For me, I look for a man who will treat me right and treat me like I’m special; like there’s no other woman like me. Now, if you do that to a girl and she doesn’t react the right way, it doesn’t mean you were wrong for doing it, it means she wasn’t the right girl. The way we fall in love is if a man truly is caring and isn’t afraid to act like it, to even act the fool for us. Don’t get callous and mean, or immature to get attention. Just be genuine and the right girl will respond in kind when you meet her. The guys that truly touched my heart and made me develop feelings for them were the ones who told me what they thought of me, regardless of the consequences.

  • Jim

    @ Attractive Fox….. I have this girl I work with. We formed a friendship when she first started working with me. She had a boyfriend most of are friendship. I know that she was into me at the beginning just by what she said and how we would hangout a lot.. I ruined that over time by pretty much being a dumbass…. My question is: Is there anyway to get her to be into me again once she stopped feeling that way..? I really like her and regret messing up with her..

  • Attractive Fox

    Women don’t actually need much.

    Be honest.

    Be open.

    Be REAL – don’t lie.

    Be direct with expectations.

    Have fun together.

    Be yourself.

    Women don’t need “bling”.

    Women respond much better to ROMANCE, try it some time 🙂

    Romance is creative surprise to let her know you think of her…. poems, notes, sms, take her some place meaningful, make a mixed cd… etc etc etc

    Women also respond to romantic words from your heart.

    Notice small things about her that noone else noticed, make her feel like the only girl on earth. (Vital, you won’t get anywhere real with a women without doing this.)

    You can be a little Random and surprising, but in a GOOD NICE WAY, not in a creepy cold way 😀

    Mysterious means.. showing up with a love letter and then smiling and saying see you later etc, mysterious isn’t standing her up, not calling or changing plans LMAO 😀

  • Attractive Fox

    PPS Last person who treated me bad once in a relationship was the very last time I ever spoke to that particular man in question. I won’t ever speak to him ever again. Most women with wouldn’t give you a second chance if you treat her badly 😀 That Jiji advice is HAHA! … What a joke!

  • Attractive Fox

    PS I am still happily in love with my love who talks to me at least 3 hours every single day for 4 years. 😀 Yum.

    Give women LOVE, ATTENTION and SMILE… be available or we will move on.

  • laurielou11

    im sorry, i know all you guys seem to think that the whole ‘hot &cold’ approach to dating a girl really works but to be honest that just messes with our head. and as for men being superior that’s never the way to fall in love, if you date little bitches who don’t appreciate you for being a kind caring gentlemen then look upon it like that is her loss, not because you have been too overwhelmingly needy or due to paying her too much attention. we all just want to be treated well and to feel like we are the only girl your interested in and to feel like we’re your all and 99% of the time we will reciprocate those feelings back to you and make yous feel like your our whole world. although there are girls out there who treat guys badly and have no consideration for your feelings, there also are girls who just want to find a guy who they love and who loves them back.. dont feel like you’s have to change…be yourself and be open about how you feel, if she doesnt agree or feels your moving too fast then shes simply not the one. but one day you will find a girl who reacts lovingly to your kind gestures and who appreciates your love for her and feels exactly the same way toward you.

  • jiji

    treat them bad then they will like u trust me

  • AnonimuslyP

    LoL boys the thing to make girls like you is very simple u have everything it takes for it in your genes u just need to activate…
    Before mens ruled over womens but now in your days things just changed…
    So if u wanna make girls love be strong, serios, attractive, dont forget about the big 5 they are very important and just try be yourself not some kinda of dummis… be the ones u really are… the dominate Males… ! Take care u can take any girl u want… is just a question… of am I wordy ? 🙂 take care young boys success ! And never try to make a girl love if she cant u will just end up bad… ! Look at the ones that really like you that are the girls for you take care !

  • Chip

    Whatever happened to being yourself?

  • Charles

    I’ve been friends with this hot girl for only a week.She’s the shy type.I ignored her sometimes and acted like she’s the one who wants and surprisingly she proposed to me!

  • zooks

    I’m dating a co worker.

    At work she ignores me a bit and doesn’t want anyone knowing anything. I called her out on her being called cold also mentioned I tell her alot how much I like her but she doesn’t tell me.

    The other night I told her she is amazing. She txt me later telling me she is glad I think she is amazing, and she thinks I’m sexy. Last week it was my birthday and we had only been seeing eachother a week but she came around my house and dropped me a card and was all sweet like “baby happy bday etc”

    We were going to meet last week but she cancelled. Then, I got into a big argument/fight with some guy at work because he verbally abused me and told her about it to which I seemed out of character.

    She told me she could tell I could be vicious or a bit aggressive, to which I said “only when pushed” she also said I know you are soft.

    We’ve been on one date but have seen eachother at work and made out a few times spoke on the phone for hours.She also told me her ex boyfriend kept trying to contact her and she hates but her mum likes him etc.

    Heres the weird part. Last night, she txt me last night asking me if Im alright after I tried contacting her and she asks me “tell me what u think about me” I’ve told her she was amazing like the day before. So I tell her she is down to earth, fun to talk to, caring and very beautiful.

    I asked her what does she think bout me, and she never txt me back anything. I don’t see the problem in that or my txt. I call tonight and no response. We were going to meet tommorow or the day after so this is weird.

  • justin

    i have a question ive always known how to get the girls.bt im kind of trapt on this one..now well i knew this girl but i had never really talked to her one night she she texted me and told me that she got my number of facebook nd weve been texting like crazy shes aweosme smart and beautiful bt i think i messed we had been texted for about two weeks nd i didnt tell her i like her i just kinda gave her i heads up nd told that its going that way.. and she responded with im not stopping you bt i will say that i wont see i tthat way..wat does that mean? and sometimes she postes on facebook i just dont get u nd i kno shes referrign to me..i havent talked to her for a couple days wat should i do?

  • Aaron

    I agree with Justin, somewhat. At first, I didnt think it made sense, that girls wanted what they cant have. Really, in a way, it doesnt. But another way it does. If you follow her around all the time, talking to her, whatever it is you’ll do, she will know that she can have you if she wants you. Easy as that. Too easy, maybe.

    My ex, who I happen to love, broke up with me a year ago. Truly, I was suprised she even went out with me. I think I realize part of the reason why now. See, before we were going out, I hung around with her a lot, but not too much, because I was kinda nervous. I wasnt constantly around her, talking to her and stuff. I wasnt around her all the time, she probably didnt think that if she wanted me, she could have me.

    But she got me. Although, like I said, she broke up with me, sadly. Although, it was kinda my fault there.

    Once we were going out though, we started hanging out a lot more. Not that hanging out with your girlfriend will make her not notice you, we just hung out a lot. Then she broke up with me for whatever reason, I have no idea.

    Problem was, even though we werent going out, I still hung out with her as much as I did before, which was almost all the time. I learned, NEVER do that. If you hang out with her all the time, you wont be noticed as much. You wont have to be noticed, because she’ll know you’ll be there if she looks. Now, dont do this. EVER. If you do happen to do this, STOP. Not only will it be better, but the time when she looks and your not there, she might wonder about it.

    She might wonder why your not around her, and where you could be. I kept hanging around with my ex until she told me to leave her alone. So, I dont hang out with her as much now. But I still hang out with her. Well, used to. She’s ignoring me now. For whatever reason, I dont know. But I think I can only blame myself.

    See, girls dont like it when your constantly with them. Even if you might be their best friend. Everyone needs space. My ex told me Im her best friend, but look, here I am, ignored by her.

    Give em space, give em time. Hang out with her, just not too much. If you really like her, and want to go out with her, you’ll do this. Not saying it’ll work everytime, but its worth a try for the girl you want, right?

    Like I said, if you constantly hang out with her, you being there will just be normal. She wont need to notice you, because you’ll be there, and she knows it. If your this far, stop hanging out with her until she notices you. After a few days/weeks, if she doesnt come up to you wondering where you were, no problem, she might have been busy. Go up to her, if she says “Hey, where were you?” Then she definitly noticed you were gone. Of course, saying that might make her sound like a b**** though, so maybe she wont say that.

    But you’ll probably notice when she stops noticing you. Once/if you notice this, leave her alone. Go up to her a few days/weeks later, and if she still doesnt notice you, maybe she doesnt even really like you.

    Point of all this is, dont seem so easy to get. I made that mistake, and now my ex is ignoring me. Hopefully this wont happen to you guys, so uhm… Goodluck.

    Oh, also. You might think your not good enough for her. Well, who knows, maybe you are, maybe you arent. Dont let it get you down. You might be just what she wants, but she just cant see it yet. Just dont suphocate her with your presence.

    Now, like I said, hopefully you guys dont make the mistake I did. And hopefully, if you do, you’ll be able to fix it, like Im currently trying to.
    So, go for the girl, because its better to try, than to sit and dream.

    Goodluck. 🙂

  • Stewart

    to me the key is:

    you LIKE her but definitely DON’T NEED her

    in a friendly way tell her some things you genuinely LIKE about her (her eye colour, a dress, her job) but also show by your actions you DON’T NEED her to be happy (talk to others, she might need to fit in around other things in your life)

  • Alex G

    Grab your balls everyday and make sure their there. Dont let the girl pick you, pick the girls you want.

    PS. Buy silver…

  • Big weezy

    dude jkal she is playing you, she wants your attention, she wants you to be her slave, ignore her for a while, and lets see what happens, she come back after a while, thats how women are

  • jkal

    hey well i started to talk to this girl this week on facebook she added me and we started to talk we talked about our likes and dislikes and bout or lives she started to put stuff that she thought i was a really sweet guy and stuff like waited to talk to him the whole day and we talked everyday and started expressin our feelings for eachother like i think ur sweet so nice and cute and eventually we planned to go to the movies this weekend she said she really wanted to meet me and she wanted to give me a kiss i was so happy i was really liking her so i went to the movies to meet up with her thing is she had been talkin bout how excited she was about meeting me and i was to she didnt show up not even call me to tell me supposivley she had her phone taken away i went home messaged her she responded much later being sorry and said her cousin wanted to hang out with her so they did and with her cousins friends thing is she met this guy who is like my enemy went to his house and chilled with him cause he was her cousins friend and she was like im sorry she feels bad and she didnt hav my number at the time and she asks me if im still gonna be her friend and talk to her and told her she should of told me and not made me stay there and wait i erased her due should i forgive her or what should i do?

  • J.P

    Well, me and my girlfriend just broke up. I believe that when you play “hard to get” it works 10x better than anything else. This girl that I’m in love with now I acted like a jerk. I never talked to her I was always an asshole. Then eventually after like 6 months I actually developed feelings for her. So I decided to ask her out and we had about an 8 month relationship before she ended it with me the other day because “I never cared.” She was literally obsessed with me the day we meet because I was what she wanted but couldn’t have. It definitely works. Now though, I’m in love with this girl and I can’t get her out of my head and she wants time and space. I’m giving in way to easily and always texting her and I basically poured out my heart which I definitely SHOULDN’T have done. Now I totally messed up everything and need to play “hard to get.” I don’t know how to go about this though because we’ve always talked everyday. All of her friends love me which is a good plus and now I showed her I actually have feelings which maybe a positive aspect. Now all she wants to be is “really good friends with me.” I think this is a ticket still because I can still play the game ad tease and sh!t. I just don’t know what she means by she only wants to be friends though because I think it’s a good thing… but I really don’t know. I’m literally lost and I really love this girl now. What do you think I should do guys? I really need help.

  • Nate

    But how to act when you are with her ?

    (1) Be good to her when you are together : be funny , interesting , optimistic , smile , touch , hint , tease . “play” with her – it will be fun for both of you to be together . but again , you can’t be like that all the time so do it a little when you feel like it . and she will never get enough of that .

    (2) When a MUTUAL connection is actually created . care , support , listen , compliment , protect , make love … this will make it special . because you can’t give this kind of attention to anyone . and will draw her to being with you of all people .

    1 is for making attraction . 2 is for making a friendship . they HAVE to exist together if love is what you want . when one is missing . the relationship will be broken . and be either stuck in the “friend-zone” or be shallow . this explains the mixed signals you must be getting . About whether you should be the good \ bad guy . it has to be a bit of both …

    but as many people said – give & take these moments . so she won’t take you for granted . and by being busy and not giving her your attention all the time . she gets her space to miss all these great things about being with you . thats how powerful the bond is .

    Remember , you don’t NEED her . you want to be with her . she CONSTANTLY needs to know that she can lose you and that you won’t be around if she treats you bad . thats why before you become exclusive – dating others will remind her that . and keep her fighting for you becoming your only 1 .

    This cant be just any stranger to create this with , you have to find someone you are attracted to – physically . and have important things in common with . and you have to be on the SAME level ( not icluding the natural differences between the roles of a male and a female ). thats why – anyone can find love . if they find someone who fits them .

    And if the chemistry between them is strong enough .they will be together even if neither is a perfect “lover” . they will be attracted like magnets . and will stay – in the ups and lows even when someone isn’t always going according to the “game” .

    Ask any pick up artist . and he will tell you that this is what he is really looking for . and some parents share that feeling .

    Relationships based only on look , money , status , admiration , will never last . and if you think someone is TOO good \ bad for you . then forget about it . don’t use someone you aren’t into . and if you feel like you deserve better – then get your way up there .


    all of the tips from people here about how to be a player (ignoring , not caring , insulting , feeling like you are the man …) might draw alot of girls to you for some short time for “fun” . but those will hate you at the end .

    Plus , girls have their own strategy and they will test you alot .

    So “love” becomes a warzone this way … And youre inlove – this advise isn’t for you because at that state you never develop any feelings for someone , and if you do , you will need to hide them and keep the act forever …

    So I hope that my words will help you get to where you really want to be .

  • Nate

    To be honest , all of these tips look “obvious” to me now . I guess I learned that after my heart got broken enough times .

    Alot of guys here , know to attract a girl – and get the “game” started . but they have no clue about what LOVE is .

    No suprise most of them are single , since they use these things to PLAY with girls . instead of realizing that these “laws” exist . for the balance of the world . and if you get the point . you can be yourself inside a good relationship .

    Remember that we are just normal people . we can’t hide under the “Casanova” mask all the time . this is why the first law is that it should come naturally – and not by “work” . so you don’t need to buy gifts , go to places , compliment , support … whatever . so she will like you . it will come out as fake . use these things to make her know you love her when the time is right .

    But she needs to love “someone” so you need to have a life . job , hobby , friends , dreams , opinions . always be on the road of self improving . and not be just be the guy thats there . when you have alot of priorities . with love being one of them . your life is more interesting .

  • Kevin

    Hey people…I have this problem where I ignore her then when I KNOW she likes me I start to bend until I break and I’m too nice…How do I keep the ignorance going without bending and breaking? I started betteriing myself at the beginning of December, and I’ve lost a good amount of weight and I’m seeing an increase in confidence to approach girls…but I still have some extra weight so for any bigger fellas out there…hit the gym it helps a ton… Thanks in advance with the help.

  • aalina387

    Become a great listener. Don’t stay in the “special” friend area for too long. Look at the signals. If she displays interest, close take action and move into a romantic relationship. If you like a girl in romantic way, you naturally want her to return the feeling. However, things don’t always work smoothly, especially if she just thinks of you as a friend or doesn’t even know that you’re exist!

  • Marcin

    hey guys there is this girl i met in college, we both have the same class, she sits behind me, and i like her, the teacher made us talk together cuz of some group project, she seems a little shy, but idk what to do, should i go for it,and tell her how focking hot she is,or ignore her? i mean she is fn hot,i really want her, but i have low self confidence ;(

  • Matt

    Look, entering the firend zone is good and can lead to a good nice relationship but what about friends with benefits or just hooking up with some chicks at partys. I do it all the time and sometimes its a hot chick other times its a drunk slut. I dont mind cuz someitmes i’m pretty durnk when i make out with them. So you don’t need a relationship to have fun with a girl. And remeber the many games there are as well: Truth or Dare, Spin the bottle, Strip Twister, Spin the bottle extreeme, Strip poker, 7 minutes in heaven, Dice to Makeout, and many more. So your options are always good

  • Tashkent D

    Well, i have doubts about being a befriend. From my own experience I can tell that I failed. I got closer to her and became friends, when it took som time to get to know her. And I liked her, then I said I like and blah blah blah ….She just said that why didn’t you tell me from the begining. So my advice is to you that be sincere and put some flavors into it to seem the best guy in her eyes. otherwise forget, never become befriend, it doesn’t work.

  • JP

    @Tyler, It’s possible she may just not like you. And nothing will turn her away faster than repeated attention and persistence if she’s already made it clear. Honestly, let her go to arms length and find a hot friend to hang out with where your target girls knows. If there is any chance at all of something developing, that will jump start it. Girls are automatically intimidated by other hot girls so she will wonder why him.

    @ Mark, unfortunately, every relationship and even marriage is a balancing act, it’s not that you’ll alays have to “game” her but youve gotta understand that when one side of the see saw goes up, the other must go down

  • Tyler

    So… i really like this girl and i even told feelings that i had for her just recently, but she said that she doesn’t have the same for me. But im sure there is some other way, i just went too fast with all the ”telling your feelings to her” part. I know and hope that there is some chance that she will start liking me more as a friend 🙂 I just have to change some things in myself, for example: be a little bit more funny than before 😛

  • Yannack

    it can go both ways aswell, i played one girl to the point where she gave me sooooo much attention that i couldent take it and she came to easy so i got bored of her after a month or so

  • Yannack

    To be able to master the whole playing games with a girl and keeping their attention with out falling for the girl and having her dumping you in the end is that you have to get dumped, it sucks but once you experience the frustration and pain you will be able to play any girl even if she was a 10 because every time you feel your falling for her you can remember that it sucks to give the girl your attention to much and getting screwed over. honestly put girls to almost your last priority, if a woman feels shes not a priority to you shes gonna continue to want you more and more, hang out with a girl for a day, then dont talk to her for 1 or 2 days. keep her guessing, dont say yes everytime she wants to hang even if ur not busy say u are. the more she thinks about you the more she will like you and want to spend time with you

  • Jon

    Women Love a man with confidence. But there is a difference between being confident and being rude and Cocky. If you can be confident, and you don’t try too hard. Women will go out of their way to get you, and you will find it easier to get them

  • wasmi

    ignore the girls, make them notice you..
    they’ll be running after you 😉

  • pee

    It too much for me.. well able to attract them taken the bull by the hone- as been the issue for most times. “say hi” than what? what if she does not open up. Just the nice guy who does not went to take advantage is cool for me. But guys for how long will I be a “nice guy” and and say it has it is I LO…….. sorry I cannnnnnnnnnnnt but willlllll some time now..

  • Mark

    OK so I completely understand the whole part about being unavailable, never giving her full attention etc etc etc.
    I did this perfectly with one girl, she fell for me hard, and wanted me soo hard. We ended up dating and she wanted to be my girlfriend.

    BUT at what point does it stop? like at what point can you stop “gaming” her and just accept that youre in love and just be there for each other?
    After 6 months, i could feel that I was into her too much and she had lost interest. She then dumped me. So Im back to square one. I just dont get it. When does it stop? or is it NEVER?

  • BrandonC

    Ok.. So theres this girl i like right.. but i think she might be A. Crazy or B. likes me alot cause like a month after talking to her she revealed to me that she had a dream that we had sex and shes been asking questions like “what would you do if i”.. yadda yadda and its usally sexually related.. should i ask her out? or just tap that and go?

  • confused

    I have multiple girls that i kinda like but I show little interest in them. Occasionally I do talk to them and they are friendly and like me; i can tell. I have read most of your coments, and I’ve tried ignoring them a little. Then when I think everything is going my way, I realize that they think im the shy one and they go for other guys. This just makes me absolutely pissed. How do I keep a girl interested in me without her going for other guys, and without scaring her off?

  • damon

    hey guys… try not giving the girl too much or too less attention! talk to her about her goals, likes and dislikes. try sounding silly to her. girls love guys who r silly sometimes . don’t try telling her boyish stuff… dat wud be stupid and bore her out.

  • ash

    look guys. what the best thing to do is be strait up and let the girl no you like her.in my case in hi school i had 7 girls that wonted to be with me just by flerting and teasing but the besta way to do it is think on a skaill of 1 to 10 1 being not inter an 10 being in love keep it at a 9 so that your keeping them wanting u and the longer it gos on 4 the more thay want u.i liked the attenchion i was getting so mutch i dident get with any of them.4 people that frees up you need to no that you have nothing to lose even if you love this person you dont no them so just go out and be your self.dont be obsesive chicks hate that and dont be controling

  • James

    Put the girl down and tease her to a point of her being abit sad. than she will start thinking of you differently, than if she ever gets upset and sad give her a hug and kiss her on the cheek. Girls dont want an easy guy who is always nice because than its not interesting

  • fog of war


    You should make sure that she knows you thought things were over between you on account of the a-hole and that you immediately tried to move on by way of the other girl. Then you should say “wait, if you were angry then does that mean you care?” If she lashes out (she’ll prob lash out) and says no then you should NOT lash out back at her. You should seem visibly hurt like she cut you to the quick. If you can do this right then she will love you again the moment she thinks she’s gotten her revenge (if you can manage to sob a little then all the better). …Do not take it personally that she showed so much anger about being left. That may be a sore spot for her. Who knows how many times that happened to her in the past? Clearly she cares about YOU.

  • Lostinthesauce

    Okay here is my dillema. There is a girl I like that has a boyfriend. We flirt all the time and the other night I just put it out on the table that I wanted to hook up with her. Everything was cool she was down with it and everything. The day after things were still good…in fact she started showing me more attention and doing things she didnt do previously. Only thing is later on that night another a$$hol3 that likes her went up to her and started saying some crazy things to her and messing with her. Almost immedietly after that everything went down hill. She acted like I wasnt even there and whatnot. Then she had the nerve to get upset because I called up a girl and left her to talk to her….how do I fix that or figure out whats going on with her? Seriously she pulled a bi polar move on me…


    I totally agree with shecallsmedaddy. I get women falling all over me. Its simple, just be THE MAN that nature intended you to be. The only problem is that, society and some books tell men to be sensive, caring, emotional wimps and guess what happens? They get screwed up by women because we are arguing nature. Good Luck GUYS. Oh! by the way, i am a bad boy as most people call it and that does not mean i beat up and abuse women. It simply means i am dancing to the rythym of my own SONG. I am true to myself and not afraid to be a MAN and take control without been a JERK. Hope this helps!!

  • Leon

    Sam, yours is easy. Just remember nothing is riske, nothing gained. Or to put it in Army terms. No gutx, no Glory, no Brain, same Story. I used to have the same problem. Then I joined the Army. There I learned I’m a pretty likable guy. Your going to swing and miss. Experience is hard won.

    I have a friend who, while at lunch, will ask a random girl if he can have lunch with her. Converstion starter right there. Then go with non-personal questions. Try random things, until you find a topic she seems excited about, then go from there. You can ask her what she does for work, or for you High school kids, what her favorite subject is. If you both like, then talk about it. If not, ask questions about it. If nothing else you will learning something new.

    Never go in like your pursiuting a women. Go in with a general and genuine curiousty. I have stated it before in my last response, body language can make and break a deal. Go in with a goal of curiousity and no expectations, and you will come across as more confident then you may actually feel, and that is a very good thing. Understand, your not going to always get what you want. If you fail, then you have given her something to talk about tonight, and then your forgotten. If you succeed, then you have given her something to talk about for a week. If you keep talking to her and start dating, then you have possible give both of you something to talk about for a life time.

    You are going to fail. That is life. Get back up and try again. An easy state of mind is, I’m not going to be here tomorrow, so might as well have fun today. When you come face to face with your own mortality, it changes your perspective. Plan for the future, and live for today.

  • Leon

    Damn slow-motion. First off, she is vulnerable. You should never go there. Be a friend and let her heal. She is wounded and you don’t want to seem like your preying on that. Be a friend, stay by her through the hard time, then there is a chance. Patience is ALWAYS key.

    If you ever get a chance to go out with her, then go as a friend. Don’t go out with the focus of winning her over. Go out to have fun, and let her know it is just for fun. Don’t set an expectation. You may over do it, which it sounds like what you did. Go out with the goal to have fun, that is easy to achieve and doesn’t put any pressure on you or her. You need to put your feelings on the back burner. Rememeber that most of your communication isn’t coming from words. It’s how you say things and body language. You will give yourself away if your in pursuit mode.

    2nd, ALWAYS be yourself. Like I said, body language will give you away everytime. Especially with someone who is hurting. She is on the look out. She might not want to start a relationship, because the pain is so recent. Show her your being supportive. Actually listen to her. You don’t have to have the answers. She just wants to be heard. Laughter is still a powerful cure, so make her smile and laugh.

    I think your focus is all wrong. You want to run in and save her the pain. While it’s not really a bad thing, you shouldn’t try to be the “Knight in Shining Armor”. Put your focus on being just friends and let things go from there. If you get her, then you get her. If you don’t, at least you had some good times. I can’t say it enough, your body language will give you away. Go in as a friend she can trust and talk too and things will evolve. Try to rush in and you will just make a fool of yourself.

    Trust your instincts. You may not notice it, but you are reading her as well. You may have done some damage. I would try to get some friends together to all go out and invite her along. Remember, your all just going out to have fun and relax. Don’t even involve the word “date”. That way, she doesn’t feel like you are singling her out. Make it a public place, and go in with the aim of just having fun. Later in the night, and not when she is drunk, you might be able to ask her out to the same bar/resturant alone. You have given her a safe feeling place to go that you both have been to. Just remember to take your time, relax and have fun. The goal isn’t to get her, it is to get her out to have fun with.

    Avoid conversations about her ex unless she brings it up. Then you just sit there and listen and non personal questions. Don’t call him a jerk, or how much you hate him. She still has feelings for him, and that is why she is hurt. Let sleeping dogs lie.

    I can’t make any promises, but you might have a chance. Tread lightly.

  • Slow-motion idiot

    I think I totally blew it with the girl I’m interested in… and what sucks the most is that she was practically begging for the attention I gave her…

    I’ve been in love with my best friend for over 20 years. We know everything about each other.
    Her husband of 5 years is leaving her cause he suddenly doesn’t ever want kids. They’re now getting a divorce. She’s feeling vulnerable, insecure and started flirting with me and kind of implied sexual situations (getting a hotel, etc.)

    Here’s where I screwed up…. I told her that she was amazing and always have been and that this guy is an idiot who didn’t deserve her. Told her that I always wished she and I had a chance to be together, blah, blah, blah… I did everything except cut my own heart out and gift wrap it for her.

    She responded kinda timid and said whatever happens in the future we’ll “always be friends”…uuuugh and what d’ya know… she backed off and hasn’t said anything more than very VERY casual conversations without giving me any hint that she feels even 1% the same way.

    As soon as I said everything I was kicking myself!

    She showed interest in me until I showed it back. should I just ignore her with basic conversation back? maybe not reply for a few days and see if she’ll try to talk to me again? I realize her heart is broken because of what is happening in her life, but she practically asked me to make her feel better and give her self esteem.

    Is there any hope for repair?

  • sam

    i have problem of shy when talk with women and i dont know how will start conversation with girls at beginning and i don’t know what to tell her because i am afraid for nothing please i need some advice to courage myself and get rid of shy!!!

  • Dating

    I found this page when looking for 5 things all girls want guys to do on a first date and well… I’m glad I did!

    Thanks for the tips.

  • matt

    i really love this girl,she knows me and we’re friends on facebook and the other day i sent her the heart sign and she didn’t answer.how can i tell her that i like her
    i need your help

  • Peter

    You all sound like really NICE guys and at the end of the day we all want that special girl.
    It’s going to take time, you will meet lots of girls, very few of them ever turn out to be what you are looking for….
    So relax and chill if you can, she will come, and when she does you will know…..
    Please guys do yourselves a favour and work on becoming a MAN, get involved in physical sports rugby, or karate, work out, eat well, dress well, try to have a life of your own.
    I suggest that you do a search on the internet: do girls like NICE guys ?
    You can then draw your own conclusions.
    Girls don’t want men they can control, if they can control you, then that means other men can control you.
    How then are you going to protect her, both emotionally and physically.
    Think about it guys, she wants someone that will protect her and her future family…………..

  • fog of war

    Ignoring a women, especially if it’s one that really likes you, can contribute to a kind of circle of violence. You have hurt this women in a most profound way. If some other guy she liked less were to ignore her she would be less hurt.

    When people are hurt this bad they tend to develop a need for payback which can manifest in MANY ways…

    I’m not saying that you should always give full attention I’m just saying that ignoring a women is a delicate maneuver and must be practiced with caution.

  • jake

    honestly if u want to a girl to like you i say hit the damn gym, people complain that it takes a long time to get the results you want but honestly arent the rewards of it worth your time?? i bet all of you like a girl who is cute,hott,skinny,tan,etc. what do u think a girl wants in a guy?? the same exact thing, and if you have the personality to go along with it, you will have any damn girl you want. Seriously its not rocket science- get the body and you will get the girl!!!

  • Been There, Done That

    Yeah @daniel you have a point ive been trying to tell them to just be thereselves and do what you normally would. An guys always smile when you feel its need too cuz if you have a cute smile theyll love it.

  • Daniel

    Hey, guys. I was looking through some of these comments, and I have to say, ignoring a girl never works. You don’t want to seem to desperate and clingy, of course, but you also want to let them know that you care. I find that being a gentleman works just fine, and they’ll start depending and wanting you. I’ll do simple things like holding open a door for them, pulling out their chair, helping them into a coat, carrying their books and bags, stuff like that. Women love gentlemen, and in return for that little manly care, they’ll start feeling more toward you. I acted like that to my last girlfriend, and she would start wanting to hang out with me more, and would start caring about me.

  • Micah

    Your all thinking way to much. And that’s why it’s so hard. Chicks are easy, you just gotta know how to read them. And say things you know will have her respond in a good way

  • will

    hey guys im gonna talk from my multi personal experiences
    i think the harder u try to win a girls heart the harder youll fail the more u ignore her the more shell try to get ur attention hey guys outthere dont try to be someone ur not dont try to act to impress the girl just be who u r no matter who u r and dont give her ur full attention try to make her feel that shes not ur prirority
    and shell fell for u like 123

  • Been There, Done That

    @Ben well ben it sounds like a similar situation i was in, sit her down and tell her your feelings but also let her know your not trying to mess up any friendships, if she really likes you you’ll know it!

  • Ben

    Well I would have to said that i am one of the biggest wimps all time with girls. And there is this girl that I really like, but she is dating one of my best friends. So I know that I cant get with her right now, but I dont know how long I can hold my feeling in for her. And I dont know if she feels the same way about me, as I feel about her. She always says stuff to me like, I want to grab your cheeks and how she wishes her kids looked like me and stuff like that. I just dont know what to do some please give me some advice on if she just likes me or not. Or if I should ask her to more than in the furture. Please help me. 🙁

  • Harry B

    I have a lot of trouble with this girl. We have been ‘on and off’ for two years. Im really into her, maybe too much so. We both have incredible times together, its amazing never ever bad. But whenever we get really close and have a good stretch of time together she breaks it off somehow. Just gives me the cold shoulder and acts all off, breaking phone calls off and so on. I always suggest that we meet up for example take her for a walk in her village, go for a meal, go on the boat, come over and play video games because she loves them. But most of the time NO im busy. I have girl friends who i can see more easily than i can see her. We both have said to each other that even if we broke up there is no one in our school we would rather be with. So whats going on? how can she love be and be so unsure?

  • Jacquee

    Hi gentlemen,
    all i can say is wow the majority of you have it wrong!! look you want to attract women right? be it a fling or the one it’s really simple. Don’t play mind games because we will think you are a jerk! all you have to do is connect emotionally and the easiest way to do that is to show a gal you actually give a damn! now on the whole bar scene the best way to approach a woman is to do it casually! don’t be creepy and give some space! here’s the scene…you see a pretty girl and shes sitting with a girl friend at the bar casually walk up next to her like your waiting to order a drink. she will look next to her! introduce yourself when she looks at you and if she has a drink other than a beer ask what it is out of curiosity and when she tells you ask would you like another? whatever the response say ok. if she takes it order the drink and one for your self and casually say it was nice meeting you(name) and walk away i assure you that you will have a conversation with her later when you cross paths again that night it’s like insurance.as for the whole wondering if you should text her good night! go for it nothing makes our heart flutter more then when you think about us WE LOVE IT! Don’t play hard to get that only works on the crazy people I.E obsessive stalkers. in other words be available but not over attentive you guys hate when we start acting clingy so don’t do it!

  • smoke

    perfect suggestion from sawyer crosby. try it

  • JJ simmons

    Me and this girl hit it off awhile back but both thought it would be better to not talk … its been a couple months now … whats the best thing to say to get her attention again? via text. or phone call?

  • Been There, Done That

    Well im almost 18 too and i just love to party, lifes miserable when ur “searching” for chicks, let em come to you, just do anything you normally would and see what i mean, unless ur butt ass ugly than love isnt for you.

  • sawyer crosby

    the true secret in the tease is to give her a little and then take it away
    -this technique is called give and take
    in order to properly tease a girl you have to be just out of her reach, yet still barely tangible, therefore you have to tease her by flirting, and seeming interested, but just as soon afterword when she thinks she has control, whip it away and either distance yourself physically or mentally for a short period and appear more interested in something else (preferably a person) —you have to make her miss you
    then bring back the interest, and take it away again, just repeat this process
    you can increase the relationship level by adding more physical gives, (or more emotional ones) this way you can get more out of her and she will feel like she is making progress while you still retain the same takes that drive her mad for you

    ***remember this technique applies to all degrees of contact, from texting, to actually being on a date, to being married and in a relationship
    this technique has worked wonders for me and i have seen it used in all ages, as giving makes you seem like a nice guy, and taking makes you attractive, wanted, and makes her up her level

    Some examples of gives
    -physical touch
    -interest in them
    -keeping in contact
    Some examples of takes
    -keeping physical distance
    -talking to someone else
    -not texting/calling/emailing back for a little longer than usual
    -not as interested

    (remember never make takes and gives revolve around physical things like presents/money)

    “give her everything except for control over you”

  • Bryt

    Wow !!!! DUDE…. that was one heck of an essay…. almost 1 – Congradulations. I’m gonna put a bet that ur never gonna get this girl at the r8 ur goin at. She’s gonna want to be friends wit u 4ever coz “ur too precious to lose”. The stuff u got up there in your essay is what u do when u wanna get Married NOT when u want a teenage luv buddy. U gotta understand that this girl is goin 2 leav u if u don’t press the ryt buttons. Ryt now, ur virtually her girlfriend who she abides in. If u plan on hookin up with this girl put simply…. FLIRT, FLATTER & TEASE. This will change your status with her from bieng her girlfriend to the guy she really wants. Its all good up there in your essay but its not gonna get u the girl & trust me, I know, i’ve bin in the same situation b4. Don’t over do the FFT but hint enough so that she can’t stop thinkin bout u. Don’t give ehr all the attention in the world… that way, she’ll only want more & so u slowly reel her in. Its like fishing, FLIRT…. cast ur rod and let her bite (Don’t over do it & don’t be the person who starts it always. When she bites FLATTER (u’ll know when she bites), TEASE…. she’s yours for the taking & don’t screw it up FFT excessively.

  • Eddie B. (almost 18)

    also i would like to add that i do hope that girl in my story is the ONE because it would be a hella lot easier then searching for another girl who doesnt care cus shes not even with me and shows she cares and thats a chick who is gonna be down to the end just hopefully i get mah chance

  • Alex

    Let me rephrase the first part, basically just be yourself, just let everything come out naturally. As far as making her feel special goes, only say something if you truly mean it (although I would stay away from commenting body parts, some girls don’t mind that much though). If you don’t actually mean what you say then she will figure it out eventually and think that you are just trying to get in her pants even if that is not your only or main intention.

  • Alex

    Ok here is my philosophy, you need to be able to make her laugh but at the same time be able to have intelligent conversations with her. You also need to make her feel special for example giving her compliments and stuff. The thing about jealousy is that it shouldn’t be your goal, it should just come naturally as in, if you don’t want to hang out with her one day then don’t, don’t feel like it is your duty to give into her demand, just do what you want basically, also life does a pretty good job at doing this, key thing is don’t focus on making her want you, just live your life the way you want to without her dictating it, things will all work out that way 🙂

  • Bailey

    if you want a girl give her a compliment like “you have pretty eyes” then walk away

  • athan u

    i work with this girl and i love her so much but i asked for friendship and she refused but we called each other on phone everyday, we use to go out and have drink yet no way.i need a help how to make her accept me for i love her much.


    @she calls me daddy….bravo..that is the best philosophy ever…no matter what men are the superior, and don’t think otherwise or they’ll get under your skin and screw you over 🙂

  • Jay

    Mrs X you are right I as a man have realised that selfishness does not lead you anywhere and there is no such thing to “improve dating” just be yourself, that worked for me. In a relationship always do what is best for both not only what you want. Man there is a great bunch of idiots in this webpage except for some who really understand what having a relationship or meeting a girl is all about.

  • Jay

    Robert SPurgeon I agree to what u believe as looks aren’t everything otherwise you will be known to be shallow, real beauty comes from within

  • Jay

    I have no problems on getting girls, just be “sweet”, but as john said it’s better to havE your priorities right first you then women, as they say “they come and go” until you find the right one 😉

  • CJD

    I’m in a bit of a problem and I hope you guys can help. In the past I haven’t had much trouble with girls and I’ve finally found the one I REALLY like. Her and I were getting very close and suddenly, out of nowhere, she stood me up, and began to ignore all of my texts and calls. I got her to say one sentence to me and that was “Your an asshole, don’t talk to me” and after that nothing. She tells her friends there is a reason, and she tells people I’m a pervert and I’m full of myself. She won’t tell me her reason nor will she say a single word to me. It’s very depressing and I do not have the slightest clue on what to do. I really liked her and I’m positive that whatever her reason is can not be true because I really focused on not messing this one up.

  • Robert spurgeon

    you guys are idiots if you look for a girl with looks you just get a stab in the back i’ve learned from experience look for a girl who has a kind heart that doesn’t like you beacause you look good.

  • Mrs X

    Okay, seriously guys????
    to: “SheCallsMeDaddy” (does that even make sense? I guess it emphasises your cerebral capability.)
    YOU are the sole reason why so many women today hate men. You think that you are evolution’s gift to women, but really all you are is a self-centered ass.You might think that women want you, and yes some would. Some infers to those who only look for men for the purposes of an intellectually disadvantaged idiot she can play around with. (I call them sl*ts) “King of this world”- okay your terminology there sounds like you are a twelve year old. Go and fix your life before posting something as obtuse as this, and maybe one day you will stop being so self-centered and notice the actual truth:
    Women and anyone in this world, does not need or even slightly want you to survive tomorrow.
    Also SheCallsMeDaddy, my apologies for using big words that you mightn’t understand. I guess I’m only a woman.

  • mark wahlberg

    OH BTW i work with this girl lol…i know she liked me before cause she would ALWAYS smile when i would come in..and someone told me this also. shes always saying how she has some guy but theyre not bf/gf or whatever recently but shes always smiling when i look at her or talk to her. i dont love her or anything but its a little crush and if something else could happen im down k thnx 🙂

  • irish guy

    btw she was american girl

  • Been there, Done that.

    @jake. Ive seen and have personally expierenced a situation like yours jake. Heres my best advice. Call her and tell her you need to have a serious talk about something that you want to get off your chest. Then ease your way into the subjuct and say somthing like ”Ya know, when you asked me that question, it just hit me that i would of loved you to be my girlfriend, but i guess thats too late now…im gunna go, talk to you later… (depending on the responce) goodnight” and hangup. The key is to let her know, that youve had seconds thoughts but there is nothing you can do about it at this point. Doing this willl get this off your chest and theres a possiblility that she will want to be yours. But dont let her know your waiting for her, continue with your life and meeting girls and you might get a phonecall from her!

  • ahdy

    but what am i gonna do if i have only 2days before she’s leaving out of the country?!

  • Jon

    Some interesting posts. I think you guys who play it cool with girls and let them see you having fun with lots of girls are on the right track. You see girls only want what they cant have, and what they cant have is a superior male, someone that is in total control of his emotions and lives in a stronger reality. Girls can feel this, and when they see this chill in you, you become a challenge. Go out to have fun for youself, not to pick up girls reaks of desperation, girls feel it. Let them chase, yes like a cat. Remember you are “The Man” higher status, unobtainable, a little ruthless. As difficult as it may seem, especially with a girl you’ve really got the hots for, appear unobtainable if you really want to score big time. Always keep her if you can at arms length somewhere between rejection and partial validation. Never give her full validation, when she comes running, chasing, reward her, show her she’s scoring some points. Then go distant again, have some fun with other girls, make sure she sees you with them, or finds out about them. Never answer any of her questions you’re single right. At this stage she’s yours make sure you keep it that way. Forget the friends stuff, believe me shell want you. If you are trying too hard to be her friend what challenge are you, wimpy stuff. Sorry guys you are wrong, girls do not feel passionate about friends. You’re the “Bad boy she’s in love with.
    Good luck Guys, have fun, enjoy every minute, I do.
    Remember your the cool guy they all want sexually, not in a best friends way, sorry thats for girls, its ridiculous.
    Just have fun.

  • jake

    So, okay here my situation

    Normally I’m great with grils not a problem hooking up with one. The think is about a month ago I met this girl at a club and had a great night we went back to her place and well we hooked up. The next couple of days we hooked up again. I thought “great, finally someone who can handle a casual thing”. Well this went on for almost 3 weeks until one night I asked if I could come over she responded with ” please don’t be mad…. but I have a date” which no problem we both said we didn’t want anything else than what we had going on already then a day later she sets up what I thought was going to be. A “play date”. So on the night were supposed to see each other I arrive at her place around 11pm and thought I was going to be like every other night we spent together. The reality was that she had to talk, which I knew what this meant she wanted to start dating that other person she went on a date. Which no worries to me. But she meantioned how it sucked cause she still wanted me but couldn’t and that was sorry. Ontop of that I let her borrow a book (she’s a reader) and she said she would return it to me even after the fact that our casual thing is over. I told her she could keep it as a gift but she very insisting on returning it.

    The thing now is I’ve realized that maybe I did have a thing for her and I should’ve said yes when she asked me if I wanted a girlfriend instead of ” I can’t have a relationship in my life right now” I think I screwed things up now I can’t stop thinking about her from time to time. She’s a great girl has a lot going on in her life which is great. It would’ve seamed like a perfect match between her and I.

    I don’t think the entire not calling/texting thing would work on her cause she’s such an independent woman. I don’t want to seam like a clingy person either by calling too soon, its only been less than a week but I think I want her…. any advice guys?

  • Been there, Done that.

    Once you get past your first, or what seems to be, ‘first love’ than you are ready to take on anything. you have to let the girl you like, know you care, but at the same time, dont care too much, or youll go crashing in a spiral mostion towards heartbreak city. As a man it is your duty to protect, love, be honest with, the girl you like. A first mistake ive noticed today was that you guys consider these girls ‘the girl of my dreams’ well you have to try and not think that, cuz it can turn out to where she doesnt even like you like that then u got urself all worked up and now ur depressed cuz you thought she was your ‘dream girl’ and what seemd so obvious, was a figment of your imagination cuz you fell to hard and too fast for this girl. Dont ever show a girl you care to much, and until the time is right, NEVER say ‘id do anything for you’ that is a definate sign of weakness and sooner or later she will begin walking all over you and gettin mad at you if you dont do the stuff she’s asked you to do everytime she’s asked you. Be confident, never be too ‘pushy’. charm the girl, a simple smile or even a wink in the middle of class could easily sweep her off her feet and let her know your interested. Walk her to her classes on occasion, carry her books once a week, let her know your there, but also let her know you could be there for someone else aswell. If they like you, this will surely drive them batty. Now the moment of truth, its been 3 weeks since youve met her and everytime she sees you she seems to smile and wave and smile and wink, if she looks down, thats an immidiate sign that she digs you. Never be someone your not, always be yourself, and if she wants to make love on the first date, deny her, with most females this is a test. DO NOT do it, tell her ‘not today babe, next time we hang out if you still want to we can’ by doing this, will ensure the girl your not just in it for sex and avoid the whole ‘making you look like a doosh’ situation. After you say that, give her a 7 second kiss, no french just lip to lip and rest ur hand on the side of her fast and the other hand around her waist, it shows love and care and it shows them you really want to be with them and your not just in it for all the wrong reasons. Now most of you smoke weed, im 16 and i do haha. But if she is interested in smoking, get her high, and tell her your feelings litle by little, it takes away that awkward feeling cuz your both stoned, keep a smile on ur face (not a creepy one) and tell her, ‘ya know, i kinda like you’ see her responce, if its, ‘awh i kinda like you too’ DONT push it, simply ask, ‘haha well how much?’ and if she says ‘hehe alot’ grab her hand and ask her ‘do you like me enough to kiss me?’ if she says ‘yeah i do’ take her by the hand, lock fingers with her, and give her your best kiss. But wait till next time to ask her out, approach the same way with the weed and instead of sayin ‘i kinda like you’ say ‘do you like me enough to be my girl?’ If she says yes then take her by the hand, lock fingers again, and say ‘will u be my baby?’ as soon as she says ‘yes’ give her a huge kiss and a big hug and whisper in her ear ‘babe i couldnt be happier’. Now if she says ‘I dont know’ then she most likely isnt the girl you want, but dont be afraid to ask why, but dont ask in person, ask over text, that eliminates all possibilities of having an ‘awkward moment’ and your being straight forward instead of beating around the bush, girls tend to like open minded guys who arent afraid to ask certain questions. Use this to your advantage, dont show any signs of weakness or depression, that lets her know, she isnt the ONLY option of a girl you have, although she might be, never let her know she is, or your chances with her are pretty much over due to signs of desperation. Enguage with other girls and make it known that the fact that she just ‘shot you down’ isnt stopping you from finding the girl you want to be with. That will trigger the ‘jealous’ reaction and if she keeps textin you, and askin you to hang with her, she will most likely be the one to kiss you first the next time you guys hang out. Read this and take it step by step, dont leave anything out, write it down and read it 200000 times if you must, and youll find out that it is extremely helpful in many ways. If you have any questions, just ask me.

  • fred ester

    I think that this girl was just being nice I don’t know. I mean maybe she was just being nice. I mean when she came over to talk to me. she leaned foward and did the open palm thing. Maybe I gave her the impression that I didn’t feel a real attraction to her. Maybe I seemed to self absorbed , I did ask her out for some coffee and she got kinda freaked I mean she started to cry . I really didn’t see her for awhile , but when I saw her the next time she was wearing a bandana like I wear . just thought that was wierd. Of course she likes country music and I cannot stand that stuff. Makes me want to kill myself

  • ProPorOOO

    I have a question, please help! I never seem to have guts to clear things up by finding out for sure whether she likes me or not – if she is not giving any obvious cues (like looking straight into your eyes etc) or is giving contradicting cues, what to do? Just ask her? Kiss her? Also, WHEN is an appropriate moment to do that during a date if we go to see a movie or hang out eat somewhere. I seem to be good at conversing with girls, making them laugh keeping the convo going, but I totally suck at moving any further. Please help me i m so confused, how exactly is this really done??

    Sorry bro your in the friend zone GET OUT you can talk to em now and then but make sure its ESTABLISHED = YOU ARE NOT THEIR FRIEND[s} (ooh hybrid [s]}
    lol not the point continuing now
    Better yourself phys. + mentally and focus on their eye contact but not too much emphasize you don’t want them SRSLY they want what they can’t rlly have so make them out of your reach[even if you secretly want them] then casually be NICE AND WANTING{ BUT NOT EVER over 75% seriously you WILL GET OWNED} AND DUMPED

  • ProPorOOO

    I have a question, please help! I never seem to have guts to clear things up by finding out for sure whether she likes me or not – if she is not giving any obvious cues (like looking straight into your eyes etc) or is giving contradicting cues, what to do? Just ask her? Kiss her? Also, WHEN is an appropriate moment to do that during a date if we go to see a movie or hang out eat somewhere. I seem to be good at conversing with girls, making them laugh keeping the convo going, but I totally suck at moving any further. Please help me i m so confused, how exactly is this really done??

    Make eye contact[but not too much] but don’t wonder lower either if you catch my drift] BE BLUNT And tell her and ignore her somewhat [20[absoloute minimum] to 70%] and your in lol do what else I SAID -GOOD LUCK NOVICE

  • ProPorOOO

    While you are working on bettering yourself, your attention wont be focused on girls, or on THAT girl. When she sees your busy doing other things you’ll appear out of her league. Making her seem very accessible to you. Eventually, you’ll gain a great deal of confidence not because you’re getting the girl to like you but mainly because you are becoming a better person from within. At this point , you can easily get any girl you ever want. It’s not pretending like you’re unavailable. It’s actually being unavailable. It’s not trying to ignore her. It’s actually being to busy to be in complete contact with her. It’s not trying to not give her your attention. It’s actually having so much other things in life that are taking over your attention.

    This is correct guy who said it [above]

    But I WILL ELA?BORATE [yeah i see the question mark damnn bastard]

    Okay girls naturally look for the alpha male which is usually the busiest/ Strongest and hard working one so you have to be that hard worker/ Bread winner doing everything in your power to be a bread winner but don’t get foolish or stupid along the way expect gold diggers expect good opportunities etc

    So to be this you have to not worry about being it and naturally be strong
    2. This is something that you are born with but I believe with my alpha guidance/leadership all of you horny males[lol] can be almost as good maybe even equal HELL maybe even BETTER than me[at girls seriously not everything else lol i just naturally am sexcist ever since i SEE girls clearly for what they are =/] IMPISH[etc]


  • ProPorOOO

    Dave my man this is all you goto do

    1. Don’t feel down about anything
    2. EXERCISE more but have rest/break day or week if you do week exercising now and then {it helps with girls and other things}
    3. make sure you smell decent to amazing [anything but bad and your good]
    4. Say in your mind I am teh $%%^ and go and ask this girl or whatever girl your interested in DUh [wait their is more]
    5. Make a good joke or conversation
    6. Be blunt about revealing intention but also not to blunt and mysterious
    7. IGNORE her somewhat in the conversation because 100 percent devotion will cause a LOSSSS
    8. Good luck you will need it because your a pansy right now but it won’t stay this way forever

  • ProPorOOO

    To: Justin P.
    i agree with Justin, i accidentally made friends with a really cute girl that i liked by telling a couple jokes (and later on trying to make it clear that i wanted to be more than friends) and one thing led to the next and then were dating, in love and now we are engaged. This is the best time of my 21 years spent on this earth and i owe it all to accidentally entering the “friend zone”.

    This is not the friend zone LOOL the friend zone is the position for a guy when he is that GIRLS friend [not boyfriend] friend You were never in the friend zone you entered the boyfriend zone dum@$$
    And girls like laughing but don’t make em laugh too much seriously ignoring = WIN

  • ProPorOOO

    I know how girls are 1. Don’t smell bad smell{ decent to amazing 2. Do not care what they think 3. Show little or no emotion 4. Do not be in the FRIEND ZONE u lose my man if u do. 5. NEVER NEVER use full attention at most 60-75% focus on other things and you shall easily prevail 5. Respect the girl 60-99% of the time[ You can keep your disrespect for her nagging etc in your mind lool] 7. don’t let anything get you down 8. Showing full attention = instant FAIL 8. Girls r effed up and impish i know how they are so stay strong don’t take it serious
    9. NO SUCH THING AS a PERFECT 10[unless you mean physically and that is just opinion]
    10. Do fun stuff with the girl sometimes and ignore her sometimes and She won’t be bored and leave you like giving her your ALL will [I KNOW WTF} This is why i respect gays a little more[gay guys]

  • Josh

    Casanova I used to be in your position. Overweight, shy, and low confidence. Look man there’s no reason for it. Worst you could get is a no. Walk up to her and say hey and have a simple conversation. Then ask her the catcher question. Are you flirting with me? Shell laugh and then shell actually start making it a point to flirt. Ask her to have dinner with you. Pick an expensive restaurant. Just don’t stutter lol

  • Dave

    Hi, I’m embarrased to say that I’m 32 yrs old and never had a girlfriend. I’ve gotten lucky lol…….but never a girlfriend. Never been in love or been loved. Had some crushes that went nowhere and a few rejections. I’ve always been overweight and have always felt inadequate and inferior. When I’m around a girl I’m attracted to my heart races, my mind goes blank and I get sweaty palms. I feel like girls totally ignore me, like I’m a natural girl “repellent”. So before christmas I decided to make some HUGE changes because I’m tired of being lonely and I want kids someday. I quit smoking cigs, started eating healthy and joined a fitness bootcamp and lost like 46 lbs now ( have like 20 more to go) . Needless to say I’m feeling like a million bucks now but still I have to work on this girl problem. To be honest, one of the reasons I began to make these changes was this girl that works at my local coffee shop started being friendly with me out of nowhere, she started calling me “hun” and smiling at me. As silly as this sounds, it felt so good when she did this as it made me feel special. So, this girl is so naturally beautiful and I can just tell she is one in a million but still I haven’t asked her out or anything. It has been like 3 months and I think she has lost interest as I’m sure she figures I have no self confidence ( if she was even interested in the first place) I know I’m my own worst enemy, I’m just so worried that I’m mistaking her being friendly for flirting. I just keep working at bettering myself but I’ve really been beating myself up about this situation as I feel I’m letting a special person slip away. God, I can’t believe how pathetic I sound……I really need some help lol. …. Anyone have any advice? I like Casanovas advice but how the heck can I get the girl If I don’t pay attention to her, she obviously isn’t going to ask me out. I need some SERIOUS help guys…..PLEASE

  • Casanova

    Hey guys !

    I have spent a while reading each and every one of your comments , and I’d like to contribute by saying something that could easily help all of you.
    I have played with a lot of girls, and have made almost all of them like me however. Since I didn’t really like any of these girls, I naturally acted much more confident.

    Then one day, I met this girl that I thought of as being amazing. This was the total end of me you see. She made me go crazy. I liked her and I probably would have done any thing for her. While I watched her go for guys that didn’t give her any attention.

    She taught me how to really treat girls :

    As Graham already said “Basically work on bettering yourself , Girls shouldn’t be a priority” , I think that this tip is probably the most effective tip.

    While you are working on bettering yourself, your attention wont be focused on girls, or on THAT girl. When she sees your busy doing other things you’ll appear out of her league. Making her seem very accessible to you. Eventually, you’ll gain a great deal of confidence not because you’re getting the girl to like you but mainly because you are becoming a better person from within. At this point , you can easily get any girl you ever want. It’s not pretending like you’re unavailable. It’s actually being unavailable. It’s not trying to ignore her. It’s actually being to busy to be in complete contact with her. It’s not trying to not give her your attention. It’s actually having so much other things in life that are taking over your attention.

  • Wannahoo

    I have a question, please help! I never seem to have guts to clear things up by finding out for sure whether she likes me or not – if she is not giving any obvious cues (like looking straight into your eyes etc) or is giving contradicting cues, what to do? Just ask her? Kiss her? Also, WHEN is an appropriate moment to do that during a date if we go to see a movie or hang out eat somewhere. I seem to be good at conversing with girls, making them laugh keeping the convo going, but I totally suck at moving any further. Please help me i m so confused, how exactly is this really done??

  • caroline

    Dear iron… i was madly in luv with someone who was nervous and stutters…just be yourself, try not to be nervous (no stuttering) and follow your heart. Theres no such thing as weird…it’s called being nervous, and you’ll get passed it

  • iron

    i`m useless at attracting girls, i aint got the guts to chat to girls and wen i do i stutter and come out with random things and they end up thinking i`m weird! lol! there`s this one lass i like, we hang out with a group of m8s every week, she knows i like her! but she likes blonde pretty boy types!
    anyone got any advice on how to change things?

  • marlon

    Be yourself and put yourself first if you and her aren’t dating…you want a girl to like you for who you are and respect you because your not going to bow down to her every command. Feelings are constantly changing so you never know but being yourself and showing her that she can’t make you Another drooling guy MIGHT make that same girl who wanted to be friends start to develop some interest… it might take time but would be worth it…just think if it as this… your planting seeds on her fertile heart…. sooner or later something will grow…but of course they are other factors but you should get the point

  • Andrew

    Justin P…you are right. Plus, being friends is one of the best ways to really get to see how she thinks. You may not be with her right now….but that’s ok.It may feel bad, but sometimes a short term loss is necessary for a long term gain. That’s if you really dig the girl, and it’s a quality connection…not just sex.

  • jonathan

    i need help there is this girl i have liked since the first time i met her i decided to talk to her and she talked back, i got her to laugh and smile and she opened up with some troubling stuff about her past. we’ve been talk for about a month now and i really want to get her to go out with me but i don’t really know how to go about it because she has tons of guy going after her and i’m that hopeless romantic type that finishes last every time. i could really use some help on how to finish first.

  • Enigma

    I have the same problem as Rob. This one girl I like I ignore but she just gets other guys. She’s impossible but has such a pretty face all I wanna do is add some icing to it.

  • Rob

    I was looking through theese comments, and I saw that some of you say that you will get the girl you want if you kinda ignore her, because then she wants your attention. Well, I got a problem, this girl im into, she is really popular. I am a good friend of her and all that, but if I try to “ignore” her or dont pay too much attention to her, she always have the other guys that she can spin around her fingers… PROBLEM! Then it wont work for me to be a nice guy, she thinks of me as some dude that just wants to screw her or she gets angry for some reason, and ignoring her doesnt make her interested either..

  • Nath

    Getting a girl to want you is pretty simple, get to know them a little but once you’ve hit that certain point back off that little bit just to let her know she has to try as well, don’t fully ignore her just let act like your not interested and it’ll drive her crazy knowing that she can’t have everyone. I’m not amazingly handsome and not incredibly ugly, but just by following those simple directions i haven’t met a girl that hasn’t wanted me. Just be confident and believe you can do it.

  • Justin P.

    If a girl is all that then being in the friend zone is better for you than being in the “this guy just wants to get in my pants” zone. Ever heard of the term “friends first”. It’s one of the only ways to win with the girls that are all that.

  • J

    I’m friends with all of he girls at my school and even though it’s fun and cool it’s also quite bad as they all only see me as friends. I tried with a couple but they all said you’re too good of a friend so I’m going to become selfish and just focus on bettering myself and try to just not try and see what happens.

  • Terry

    To: Justin P.
    i agree with Justin, i accidentally made friends with a really cute girl that i liked by telling a couple jokes (and later on trying to make it clear that i wanted to be more than friends) and one thing led to the next and then were dating, in love and now we are engaged. This is the best time of my 21 years spent on this earth and i owe it all to accidentally entering the “friend zone”.

  • SheCallsMeDaddy

    Brent…. the reason that you failed is because A. you probably mentioned the situation to a coworker who figured she was single and looking and knew he was a bigger man than you…. or B. she figured out that you were a slow-progress waste of her time and most women need sex more than we do…. contrary to popular belief…. they just need to go about it more discreetly than you or I. She found a man that can give her what she wants. I have showed a girl the bathroom and shoved her against the wall and started kissing her when we got there and have had amazing results…. it works if you know what you’re doing and make sure she’s not seriously about to leak and burst at the seams because then you’ll just look like an idiot…. you need to hang out with women before you can read them well so female friends do nothing but help your situation.

    Think how much you want her and multiply it times 2 and that’s how much she wants you if she gives you the time of day and wants to hang out with you….. women get hit on constantly and approached all of the time. Any woman who makes time for you either likes you as a friend because you chose that or because you f-d up, or she wants you more than you know because you just can’t read the signs.

    Most women are taught that men should make the first move in our American culture…. so the man who addresses the sexual tension and provides an outlet to either feed or resolve it will always be more successful than the man who denies it to be a “gentleman” or please a lady…. Women want a man, not a gentleman…. they just want a gentleman when they take you around the family or friends. I hope that this helps…..

  • SheCallsMeDaddy

    The best advice that I could give all of you guys out there is to go into any situation with a woman as a man. If you are a pansy it will never work, no matter who you talk to or what stupid books you try to read. Once you realize that women need you more than you need them you will never have to log onto a forum like this unless it’s to help other misguided people out. I see beautiful women all day long, but once you fall in love or think some woman is “out of your league” you have failed! Dress how you want and talk how you want…. thousands of years of evolution has made man king of this world despite all of the feminist rantings that say otherwise. I love women and my mother is a feminist, but any woman I talk to knows that I am king in this world because I don’t give her a reason to think otherwise. Once you treat a woman different than a man or you put her on a pedestal you have reduced yourself to a whiny sensitive patronizing little boy….

    Women under the age of 27 do not like to be monogamists because it is not in their nature unless you challenge their nature. The same way that the finest girl you have ever met can piss you off and you dump her is the same way that women are. Give them too much and they won’t need anything else from you.

    Quit thinking with your dicks, guys! Your uber-sensitive attitudes and willingness to bend over backwards for a girl is the reason that you girl dumps you to talk to me.

    Man up and realize who you are in this food chain. You are a man and she is a woman, and no woman is going to be swept off her feet by a man who is more caring and chummy than her friends. Let your girl do whatever she wants and go wherever she wants because a real man knows that his woman will always come back to him because he is a man…. just like a cat that you feed will always come back unless they don’t need you anymore. Women are like cats and most of you guys out there need them more than they need you.

    No man should ever sell himself short and any man that can help should do his duty and say something before his fellow man falls…. but if you don’t have hope then we will let you do what you do because we need little whiny sensitive b*tches like you around to give women perspective on where they could be if they didn’t talk to real men like us….

    Get at me and quit letting these woman walk all over you…. women are way more social than we are and they spend a lot of time talking sh*t about all the guys that are so sweet and understanding but could never do them right…. don’t be that guy.

  • Tonner

    Best friend??? Then you’ll be in the friend zone -_- you have no idea what you’re talking about.

  • Justin P.

    Oh and one more thing. I’m reading on here that alot of you guys are falling completely head over heels for what seems to be like alot of Perfect 10’s. That is a bad thing and you will not get what you want. She is already winning big time. You will think yourself into insanity in this situation. Somehow you have to turn this bad situation around. Get very selfish fast. Get out get a life and concentrate on making yourself all that in every possible way. Then pretend to be barely interested in her or just a good friend. These are the only ways.

  • Justin P.

    Okay this is what I’ve learned about girls. And alot of these guys are totally right. Girls definately want what they can’t have. Or better yet what they think they can’t have. Girls actually invented “playing games” and are masters at the art of being attractive. This power that they have feeds their ego when they can manipulate guys. Girls are totally used to getting what they want. Usually if a girl is your best friend 9 times out of 10 she has a thing for you. And it is definately more important to focus on other things than trying to get a girl. It really does happen when you least expect it. And girls definately want guys who are at least on their own status level. And the last thing the more you try and figure girls out the more it will just confuse the crap out of you. They are impossible to figure out. The best bet. Lie and convince her that your her best friend and by the time you know it she will have developed a thing for you. Then make a bold move.

  • Brent

    I started hanging out with this girl from work, we made each other laugh like crazy. There was a spark pretty quick, after a week it seemed like we were about to launch. I wasn’t pushing for intimacy too fast because I thought i’d take my time with this one and i didn’t want a bad rep at work. Then all of a sudden at a staff party she takes a co-worker(my friend) home. Next thing I know shes all into him from that night on. Did she do this to piss me off for not making a move sooner?

  • Alex Perez

    okay guys, im doing pretty good right now. i Messed up in getting too serous with my Ex EX girlfriend. i was sort of an ass to her at the beginning. I ignored her, didnt talk 2 her munch, she basically wasn’t very important to me. She fell in love with me and was crazy about me. little by little i fell in love with her and gave her my FULL attention… she screwed me. and got bored. she even told me herself i was annoying when i told her she was grogeous, etc. then she broke up with me. so after a bit, i sucked it up and moved on to another girl. now she (my ex ex) was super jealous and wanted me back so bad. i was such dick to her cuz she deserved it. and never ever payed attention to her. i told her to leave me alone soo many times. if i called her right now and told her to come over to my house, she would. so see, pay small attention to girls and act like a bit of an ass and they will want you. pay your FULL attention to them and they will hurt you.

  • rich

    Girls get bored when they receive a lot of attention from a guy, although that’s what they desire, the same things get tedious after a while. You gotta switch things up, tease her one night, maybe not reply to some of her texts one day, then another day talk to her a lot. Be sorta stubborn, don’t always give in to what she wants but always treat her with respect.

  • Jake

    Hey, when he says to ignore them, it works like a charm. Not only will girls want you, they will text/call you, and when you do want to hang with them they will come running. Also when you give them little attention it allows you to meet new people and live life instead of chasing the girls.

  • Mobli

    Good point, just better yourself.. The girls will come along

  • Matt

    Ive just been playing it low key.. and it seems to be working 🙂 Good luck with ur D Bag!

  • Matt

    Ok guys! So I met this chick! Shes frekin amazing! We’ve been talking a few weeks, and I think Im pressuring her/ giving her too much attention too fast. I told her Im going to back off and let her come to me… I did’nt hear back and texted her askin “when u wanna get together again”. Yeah.. no response.. So now that I kinda messed things up by pushing too fast, what do I do!? Im just going to leave her alone.. no texts.. emails.. nothing.. Hopefully she will come back! She is literially amazing! Just hope I didnt screw up 2 bad already 🙁

  • nicholas

    come on please write back

  • nicholas

    if i send i girl a email that says good night would she know i like her

  • Just A Kid

    @James Tike , i am having the same situation as you as well . The one i liked alot always get intimate with me everytime we are alone , like we talk and cuddles , we are very close when we are together alone . But during school hours , she ignores me quite alot and talk to other guy instead ! I’ve confessed to her that i like her but she didn’t do so , and lately she told me that i hurt her ego , so she wanted me to ignore her for three days before we get to talk to each other again . I felt very intensely depressed because of this and i can’t seem to focus on my examination and studies ! I prayed to God hoping that thing that i’m so afraid of won’t happen to me . And now i realize that what i should do is to be the best of me and change myself to be the better so that i can provide and be a better man that she deserves . One thing is for sure , this road i choose is going to be a very very tough one , wish me luck guys ! Best of luck to all of you that have the one and only you’ve feel in love too ! =)

  • Sal

    Women should never be the priority, it’s a sign of weakness really. You go out, you go out to have a good time. You go to the gym to feel good and you buy clothes that you like and make you feel good. If you get girls, it’s a bonus. Last year i got too serious about one girl and it turned into a disaster!

  • gumby

    sad but i think you might be right john. props to you. no props to life. silly thing. how much time we spend trying to “win” something so meaningless. better yourself. better your mind.

  • James Tike

    Ok I need some advice there is this girl I like at work. Whenever we go for happy hours in groups with people at work she gives me all the attention like we are in our own world. Also she had came with a few times to get coffee and dinner and we talk for hours. Also after work we will talk for hours sometimes in the parking garage. I know she is very shy but at work she ignores me act like I don’t exist. For example if we hangout on the weekend, then on monday she will try to keep her distance like she barely knows me. What is going on???

  • Smoke

    I need some advice from you guys. I’m nervous when I’m dating a girl, so, what to think and what to say when I’m dating?

  • Chucky

    Damn … this I’m gonna try this out to a girl I’m in love with like crazy.

  • santiago

    my girlfriend out of no where decided she couldn’t be in a relationship with me no longer, from being scared, cold feet, to wanting to be alone maybe date other guys to this is how I am, to no longer having feelings for me, after only 2.5 months of dating…i admit things were intense yet we were apparently on the same page with want we wanted out the relationship, we knew each other back a long time, never talking though, hooked up 20 years later, what could of happened? her excuses don’t make any sense…

  • DanJo

    “Basically work on bettering yourself, girls shouldn’t be a priority.”

    I like that graham well said


  • john

    you guys need to stop being suckers for girls, think of the girl like she should be lucky to have your time, once she sees notices that you have other priorities and you seem like your at the top, she will want to be with you, you don’t even have to win her over… she will just want to be with you because you don’t give her attention and she want to get your attention, and once you end up giving her your full attention she will get bored n leave you…. its the circle, so know what? Don’t be a sucker, and always tease her, flirt, keep her interested, but have one hand pushing her back along the way, and never give her your full attention and put her before other things.

  • Noe Arroyo

    Hello everyone,

    I keep having trouble on trying to keep a wonderful girl to be interested in me. We txt each other more than just talking on the phone. One day I decided to call her, but I got so nervous. I could’t speak well and I started to stutter a lot. Sometimes I don’t know what to say, cause I think I will say something wrong. I’m afraid that she might reject me, cause of the way I am or live. If anyone could give me some advice, I would appreciated.

  • jade

    So yeah i met up with a girl i used to give a ride to school every day and she’s like my dream girl… Problem is that she just came out of a bad relationship and has many guys after her…we have pretty much spent the last 5 days together and i’m going crazy… How do i know or get her feeling the same way??????

  • graham

    One thing I have learned is that when you want a girlfriend too much, you are bound to fail.

    Ever since I told myself “focus on other things”, girls didn’t matter, and I just basically ignored them.

    It helps to work or go to school because it’s a very social place and it’s not awkward because you both are on the same level, so she really can’t think she’s better then you. (kind of like it states above)

    It also has a lot to do with your personality, and how confident you are. Girls don’t like guys who are shy, scared, nervous, or caring of what people think of them, or more so if people are looking at them.

    Basically work on bettering yourself, girls shouldn’t be a priority.

  • zach

    Okay if u see a pretty girl give her a nice compliment like on her hair or nails or clothing etc …they will think that you aren’t all about sleeping with her and what not try it see how it works out for u

  • Dave

    I did. It was so easy and ‘im not even good looking i’m overweight. she liked smoking and I always had smokes so i’d always kind of manipulate her into spending time with me by asking her to roll me blunts because i couldn’t and she knew i couldn’t. So as time went on we became BEST friends. Like she would call me every day and shes all i hanged out with for like a year. Now, everyone hates her who i want to party with so i don’t really hang out with her any more and she now has a boyfriend.
    so yeah its really not that hard.

  • Tom

    “befriend an attractive girl” – great idea – any tips on doing that??