Comfort Lessons: How To Make Her Feel Comfortable And Trust You


Every man desires to be that attractive guy that women want. We spend hours upon hours trying to figure out what is the ideal way to attract a woman, to get her interested in you. Yet, most men overlook a simple fact when they pursue their seduction education.

Regardless of how attracted a woman is to you, she will not be going home with you if she doesn’t feel comfortable with you. That’s why it’s important, dare I say, ESSENTIAL, that you learn how to make a girl feel comfortable with you.

Signs you are making her feel uncomfortable
Signs you are making her feel uncomfortable

You Are Her Protector

If she doesn’t think that you’re the type of guy who will protect her and treat her as a woman, she will leave you and find someone who will. The trick to really getting her to want you is to learn how to make her feel safe and comfortable with you.

A mistake many men make when they want to get to know a woman is to ask her an endless array of questions. They try this in an attempt to find commonalities with the women they pursue, an interest they share, a person they both know, a place they both go, anything that can lead to a more in depth conversation. This often has the opposite effect on them though. No woman wants to be on the other side of an interrogation. Instead of assaulting her with an endless array of questions, make solid statements that she can respond to.


Don’t Seek a Reaction

State your feelings and observations instead of requesting a response. Don’t ask “What music do you listen to?” – say “I love 60s rock music.” By making statements instead of asking questions, you immediately set yourself apart from the other men and make it clear that you do not care about her reaction, while still allowing her to find commonalities with you. You are a man in your own right and you are proud of it.

Be Proud Of Your Life

Another way to make a woman feel comfortable in your presence is to reveal yourself bit by bit. When talking to her, don’t be afraid to share with her deep, personal stories about your life. The more emotionally charged the story is to you, the more your woman will feel, and even almost experience, the same emotions that you felt. By making yourself emotionally vulnerable to her, you are almost giving her the power over you and making it clear to her that you are willing to give her insight into your life. Women don’t want to be the experience – they want to share an experience with someone else. They want to be able to understand you and truly feel a connection with you, something which you make possible by sharing stories about yourself with her.

Remembering The Details

A skill that most men lack when it comes to picking up women is the ability to listen. So focused are they in getting what they want and making the woman see just how great a catch they are, many men just don’t care about what the woman says. Women can sense this about a man. Nothing is more frustrating and pushes people away than if people don’t listen to you. Hear what a girl tells you and remember it. Most men don’t even bother remember the names of the girls they approach! Listen to her and don’t judge what she tells you. If you remain non-judgmental, women will trust you more and open up to you, revealing some of their innermost secrets because they know that you won’t think any less of them for it.

The secret to making women around you feel comfortable is simple. By appearing open and non-threatening you immediately reveal yourself to be someone honest, while listening to her and being non-judgmental about what she tells you makes yourself trustworthy in her eyes. With practice, you can build up strong connections with many women who will always be comfortable and trusting of you, something that the majority of men are unable to do.

Frequently Asked Questions
Any suggestions on how to make her feel comfortable and entertain her?

Hopefully she'll realise you're really keen to make sure she enjoys herself whilst she's staying with you. If she's only 13 she's probably pretty homesick already though. She's almost certainly shell shocked at this point.

Ask her if there's anything she would like to try to experience life in your country. (The US I assume?) So any typical experiences she was hoping for or imagined before she came over.

Is there anything unique about your locale? Food, or wildlife, any kind of local stuff? You say not, but to a stranger quite interesting maybe.

I do feel for you though. I'm from the UK and somehow ended up hosting the niece of our French teacher. Kid was pining for her bf, and also anorexic. She wouldn't eat or drink anything but apples and black tea. We took her out on trips and she fainted from lack of food in practically every stately home in England.

Any advice on how to make her feel comfortable?

Well as a start I’d ask her mum what sanitary products she’s using and make sure you have enough in for her to use, maybe open the packet so she doesn’t think “oh no if I open these people will know I’ve used them”

How best to make her feel comfortable?

To be honest, a first meeting in a public place would be much better. It gives her a chance to get to know you a little and confirm your nonpsycho status. Having the first meeting at your place, which I assume will include the expectation of sex, is probably nerve wrecking to a certain degree. I know it would be for me.

Me 6 months how to make her feel comfortable?

You're acting like you're all self-aware regarding your own behaviour. Well, prove it. Don't tell her how sorry you are over and over again, show her by respecting her boundaries and by not repeating your stupid mistakes. If you really, actually do this and let time pass, then you might be okay. But don't revert back to old behaviours once things smooth out.

How to make her feel more comfortable with the age gap?

Hey! I dated someone 12 years older than me while I was 18-21. Tbh it fucked me up pretty bad. I’m 28 now and would never consider dating someone younger than 25. When you’re that young there’s so much you haven’t experienced and your brain doesn’t comprehend things the same as a 30 year old. I’m obviously generalizing.

Everyone is different and it was one of the most significant learning experiences of my life so far. I’d say go for it but recognize that your problems are likely very different than hers and open communication will be crucial. The one thing that makes me hopeful for you (unlike my past experience) is that the lady you like has expressed hesitation. My ex has a track record of dating girls significantly younger than her so it’s kind of more of a fetish so she knew it wouldn’t work out long term. Fun times.