The number one rule on how to start a conversation with a girl you just met is easy:

Keep it simple, keep it fun.

When you talk to a woman for the first time, remember that she doesn’t know you and anything too intense will push her away. Instead, use these conversation starters to get her more interested.

man approaching a woman at bar

Situational Conversation Starter

Make a comment about something around both of you at the time… using the environment to start a conversation with a girl is the easiest way to do it.

While shopping at the grocery store… pick an item next to her: “Mmmm, this is going to be great tonight. They say you shouldn’t shop when you’re hungry! I know why now! Hi, I’m Chris”

If you’re at the library, mention something about the librarian at the door or even about the funny security guard at the entrance. An environmental opener can be used anywhere, but it does take a bit of quick thinking depending on where you are.

Direct Conversation Starter

Just say “hi”

Sometimes just saying hi is enough to get a decent conversation started. This works especially well in boring situations such as waiting in line.

“Hey, I saw you and just had to come say hi. I’m Chris” (Put out your hand to shake hers)

If there’s nothing special happening and you are both bored, then saying hi will just come off as being social. We have an entire section on direct approaches that I recommend you check out.

standing in line while chatting
Why not make use boredom to your advantage

Starting A Conversation With An Opinion

Some men feel more comfortable jumping right into a topic with an opinion on a certain situation.

“Hey, really quickly… I just got back into town. What’s the best thing to do these days around here?”

or even,

“Hey, this is random… but I wanted a stranger’s opinion. My friend wants to propose to his girlfriend and his biggest concern is the ring. Do girls really care about the ring size?”

The advantages of this is that it automatically leads to a full fledged dialog about whichever topic you introduced. The disadvantage however, is that if you randomly ask for someone’s opinion, they might think you’re polling a survey or something. They might be on the defensive right away since people automatically avoid salesmen on a daily basis.

Exchanging opinions is a great conversation starter… but beware the environment you are in

The one context where an opinion opener will be acceptable is in a social environment in which everyone is already talking, ie: party or a bar.

Beginning A Chat With A Comment About Her

Now this is risky but can lead to a quick and successful conversation if done right.

“Whoa, you have a good energy around you… kind of a no-bs fun living girl that’s adventurous. I’m Chris”

By noticing something unique about her, she will be likely to want to engage in a conversation to talk about her favorite subject, herself. For example, if a girl is wearing a huge hat, she’s doing it for a reason: she wants to be noticed and for people to talk to her. So just pick up on these subtle (and sometimes obvious) cues.

Ease into the conversation by mentioning something distinctive associated to her

How to start a conversation with a girl can be quite easy once you’ve mastered these few techniques. Once it’s started, you will need to have something to say to continue chatting with her! One of the best resources to read so you never run out of things to say is the book Double Your Dating by David Deangelo.

The words printed on the pages of his book have a way of sticking in your brain and will make you a better conversationalist than you ever thought possible.

Resources & References

Want to learn more about starting conversations? Here are some of the sources that we used to write the article (And a few videos we found useful)

  1. TheRomantic discuss a unique story behind a 20 year old experiment on 36 questions to make anyone fall in love with you with surprising results.
  2. Celebrity Ashely Weston talks about the best conversion starters that actually work.
  3. Alpha m’s. brilliant analogy on conversation starters and how to be successful when using them.


1. What are some icebreaker questions I can ask?

What are some of your favorite icebreaker questions?

1. What is your favorite thing to do in the winter?
2. What is your favorite winter activity?
3. What is your favorite winter food?
4. What is your favorite winter drink?
5. What is your favorite winter clothing to wear?
6. What is your favorite winter memory?
7. What is your favorite thing about winter?

2. What if I don’t know anything about the person I’m talking to?

If you don’t know anything about the person you’re talking to, it’s best to avoid sensitive topics and stick to more general conversation starters. Get to know them a little bit by asking about their hobbies, interests, or work. Once you have a better understanding of who they are, you can start to ask more personal questions. However, if you’re still feeling uncomfortable, it’s perfectly okay to say that you’d rather not talk about certain things.

3. What are some topics of conversation I can bring up?

Some possible topics of conversation include:
-current events
-the weather

4. How can I keep the conversation going?

Well, first of all, you could try asking your conversation partner questions about themselves. Get to know them better. What are their interests? What are their hobbies? What kind of things do they like to do in their free time?

Another idea would be to share something about yourself. Talk about your own interests and hobbies. Tell a story about something that happened to you recently. Anything that will help the other person get to know you better.

5. What are some signs that the conversation is going well?

The conversation is going well when both parties are engaged and interested in what the other has to say. There is mutual give-and-take, and both people feel like they are being heard and understood. The conversation flows smoothly, without any awkward pauses or stilted moments. There is a sense of rapport and connection between the two people. They may be laughing and joking together, or simply having a serious and thoughtful discussion. Either way, the conversation is enjoyable and feels easy.

6. What are some signs that the conversation is not going well?

1. One sign that the conversation is not going well is when the participants are not making eye contact with each other. Instead, they might be looking around the room or at their phones.

2. Another sign that the conversation is not going well is when people are interrupting each other or talking over each other. This can create a feeling of frustration and make it difficult to communicate effectively.

7. What should I do if the conversation lulls?

If the conversation lulls, there are a few things you can do to try and keep things going. First, you can ask the other person questions about themselves. This can help to get them talking again and can also give you some insight into their life. You can also try talking about something that you are passionate about. This can help to get the other person interested in the conversation again. Finally, you can try telling a story.

8. How can I politely end the conversation?

Some tips on how to politely end a conversation include:

-Thank the person for their time and say that you have to go.

-Make an excuse such as needing to use the restroom or getting back to work.

-Say that it was nice talking to the person and that you hope to talk to them again soon.

9. What should I avoid talking about?

There are a few topics that are generally considered taboo or off-limits in polite conversation. These include topics like sex, religion, politics, and money. It’s important to be aware of these taboo topics and to avoid them when you’re talking to someone you don’t know well, or when you’re in a formal or professional setting.

sex: This is probably the most taboo topic of all. It’s considered impolite to talk about sex in most social situations.

10. What are some general conversation tips?

Assuming you want tips for carrying on a conversation:

1. Be an active listener. This means not only paying attention to what the other person is saying, but also engaging with it. Ask questions, make comments, and show that you are interested in what is being said.
2. Be aware of your body language. Make eye contact, face the person you are talking to, and avoid crossing your arms or looking away.
3. Be genuine.

11. How can I start a conversation with someone new?

First, try to relax and be yourself. If you’re feeling nervous, take a few deep breaths and remind yourself that there’s no need to be anxious – everyone’s just a person, just like you.

12. How do I keep a conversation going?

The best way to keep a conversation going is to be a good listener. Listen to what the other person is saying and ask follow-up questions. Be interested in what they have to say and avoid talking about yourself too much. Also, be aware of body language and nonverbal cues. If the other person is crossing their arms or looking away, they may be indicating that they want to end the conversation.

13. How do I know if someone is interested in talking to me?

If they are making eye contact with you and smiling, that may be a sign that they want to talk to you. Additionally, if they are standing close to you or leaning in when you are talking, that may also be a sign of interest.

15. How do I know what to say?

The best way to know what to say in a conversation is to be an active listener. Pay attention to the other person and what they are saying. Try to ask questions about the topics that are being discussed. Also, be aware of your body language and try to keep an open and friendly posture.

16. Who should you avoid starting a conversation with?

There are all sorts of people you might want to avoid starting a conversation with, depending on the situation. If you’re in a business meeting, for example, you might want to avoid the person who always tries to steer the conversation off topic. If you’re at a party, you might want to avoid the person who always wants to talk about themselves.

17. Who benefits the most from starting a conversation?

There are many benefits to starting a conversation, and it really depends on the situation and who is involved. In general, though, starting a conversation can help build relationships, create new opportunities, and exchange information.

Building relationships is one of the most important benefits of starting a conversation. When we talk to others, we create bonds and connections that can help us in both our personal and professional lives. These connections can make us feel more supported and can lead to new opportunities.

18. Who benefits the least from starting a conversation?

There are many people who benefit the least from starting a conversation. These people may be introverts, people with social anxiety, or people who are shy. These people may have a hard time starting a conversation because they are worried about what other people will think of them. They may also be worried about saying the wrong thing or making a fool of themselves.

19. What are some conversation starters?

What are some conversation starters?

1. So, what do you do?
2. What’s your favorite TV show/movie/book?
3. How do you like your coffee/tea?
4. What’s the best/worst thing that’s happened to you this week?
5. What are you working on/studying/ interested in lately?
6. What are your plans for the weekend?

20. What are some things to avoid saying when starting a conversation?

Some things to avoid saying when starting a conversation are:

1. “So, what do you do?”

This is a conversation starter that is often used, but it can sometimes make the other person feel like they are being interrogated. It is better to ask questions that are more open-ended and allow the other person to share as much or as little as they want.

2. “You’re so pretty/handsome!”

21. What are some common topics to discuss?

There are an endless number of potential conversation topics, but some topics are more common than others. Small talk is typically the first step in starting a conversation, and common small talk topics include the weather, current events, sports, and hobbies. Once you get to know someone better, you can move on to more personal topics, such as family, friends, work, school, and travel.

22. What are some ways to keep a conversation going?

Assuming you would like tips for keeping a conversation going:

1. Find common ground: If you can find something that you both have in common, it will be much easier to keep the conversation going. This could be anything from a shared interest to a similar background.

2. Ask open-ended questions: Asking questions that can’t be answered with a simple yes or no will encourage the other person to keep talking.

23. What are some ways to end a conversation?

There are many ways to end a conversation. Some people may say goodbye, while others may say something like “it was nice talking to you” or “I have to go now.” Some people may also give a hug or handshake.

Frequently Asked Questions
How would you like a guy to start a conversation with you?

Find out where she lives and who she is and message her the names of all her relatives + their contact info

How to start a proper and not awkward conversation?

Do you have problems finding an "opener" or keeping it going after you say hello?

How to start a tricky conversation with my about less visitation?

This is what happens when you move in to someone else's property. If you want regular rules, then you need to pay rent and have a landlord. That's the only real way to guarantee that the owner of the house won't invite themselves over.

How to start a conversation like a japanese person?

Like a Japanese person?
暑いですね. That's pretty much it.