Sometimes you don’t even know you’re doing it… but you’re chasing girls away. Why is it that nearly all guys (and girls) do this? Everyone’s felt a moment, at least once in their life when they felt like they “screwed it up”. Often, you can even pin-point it to an exact moment. Everything was great, the girl was into you… and then in a split second, it all changed.
If you’ve ever been building up to a special moment with a girl… only to have it fizz away within moments, then read on, because we’ll make sure it NEVER happens again.
So what happened?
You might have said something, maybe you did something… but you know, that in THAT instance, it was over.
When you’re starting to get to know someone, there’s always a fine balance of “who likes who more”. If you like someone too much and too quickly, you’ll push them away. If you don’t care for someone enough, then they’ll just give up.
The trick is to find the right balance, so that you’re both equally ‘in-like’ with each other. Girls are GREAT at this. They are very sensitive to how others feel, and they’ll often stay in the zone where they like you ‘just enough’ so you’ll keep trying.
That works both days.
As a guy, the first thing you have to realize is that girls actually want to hang out with you… just because you’re a guy. Have an interesting life, do fun things and girls will WANT to hang out with you as long as you don’t push them away with too much attention.
That’s going to be the number one rule to ‘not screwing up’ with women: Know that they actually like you for who you are.
Girls ARE attracted to guys. Even the short, scruffy, bald ones.
What happens is that men tend to forget this… so they try really hard to convince women to like us. They chase girls, start doing things so they’ll like them. All of this pushes them away.
Switching It Around
Remember that moment when you screwed up? It’s likely that you became too attached to the outcome. You really cared for her (that’s normal) and you started chasing her, tipping the scales of how much one person likes the other.
You created chaos where there was previously balance… you screwed it up even though she originally wanted you.
When guys screw it up with girls, usually it’s because they started caring WAY too much. When this happens, you’ll start calling her twice a day… every day. You’ll buy her gifts, write on her Facebook wall, and completely invade her life.
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Whenever someone starts liking you too much, you instantly get turned off. That person becomes someone you want to avoid instead of someone you want to spend time with.
So by all means, preserve the ‘in-like’ balance when you meet a girl. You can do this by having an active social life, interesting hobbies and a fun life of your own. When you’re out doing things, you’ll be too busy to romance about someone. That’s when things will just work out on their own.