Read Me: How To Keep Going When Life Gets Tough

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Sometimes it seems to be the hardest thing in the world. Let me tell you something about me that I’m sure you can all relate to: even today, with the happy life I’ve designed for myself, I fall into phases of failure, melancholy, dejection. Phases when I “technically” know what it takes to attract that woman, get that job, take that challenge, but I just can’t pull it off. Look, it’s human. We need those phases to remind us that we’re vulnerable, and how to keep going. Let me share how I get back on top (or sometimes she’s on top, depends on the mood)!

I’ll give you a couple of seemingly unconnected pointers here, but bear with me, I’ll tie them up in the end.

Search yourself

More often than not, dry spells come when something within us gets out of balance. We feel down, drained, jaded, sad. It spirals from there: your doldrums show when you interact with others, they influence your actions, and that’s how they affect the outcomes.

First of all, embrace your moods. You’re not a machine. You have emotions, and they work the way they do. If you try to fight them, to force yourself into “happiness” or cheat your body with coffee and cigarettes, you’ll just make it worse.

Instead, take it down a notch and reflect. Listen. What is it you’re unhappy about? What is your body trying to tell you? We often have a hard time interpreting our feelings just because we don’t listen to them. Don’t try to combat problems by doing more pickup, that never works out.

We think that “to keep going” means to carry on as we were, ignoring the signals our body is sending. Well, that’s wrong. Think about specific moments where you feel low. Is it at work? Was it the house party on Saturday where you blew all those conversations? Is it when you spend another evening alone watching TV? Is it when you waste time on the internet and you know you could do something meaningful instead, but you just can’t bring yourself to to it?

Design what you do next

You will find that some of the things that ail you, you can’t (easily) change. Yet, you can always, under any circumstance, change your attitude towards them! This is done easiest when you have something else in your life that

a) you have full control of
b) is going well.

You need to create something that’s uniquely yours. That “they” can’t take from you. So design what you do next. Consider: what do you love? Are you into music? Acting? Singing? Dancing? Web design? Photography? Painting? Drawing?

Hey, there’s a lot. If you look just a bit below the surface, you will easily find activities to help you channel your emotions – your soul. I’ll call them “creative outlets”.

Reclaim control

So you have some loose ends now – listen to your emotions, change your attitude towards circumstances, find creative outlets. How does it all fit together?

Well, these steps entail each other and work together to pull you out of your rut. Of course, you have to identify first what’s going on inside you. Then, you should to find where you can make a change – some things you can amend like that (stop watching TV all the time), others are circumstances you have to deal with (or make huge changes in your life to get rid of, e.g. quit, move away).

This is where you want to design your own outlet. So you start drawing or writing. Soon enough, you have truly captivating stories or sketches! They make you happy because your soul can manifest in them, and others love them because they feel the emotion inside. Now, this is what allows you to change your attitude towards circumstances: you just don’t care about them as much anymore, because you’ve learned how to keep going despite circumstances. There is good stuff happening in your life, and it’s because you sparked it. Now how easy is it to get that job, pass that test, and seduce that woman?

Frequently Asked Questions
How did you maintain the discipline to keep going day to day?

You're 23 years old, I'm not much older than you (27) and I've only recently started to learn how to code so I can make a career change. And **it is hard**.

Here's the thing, this is a field where you could, theoretically, go from 0 knowledge to a Jr web dev position in +/- 6 months. This doesn't mean that everyone is going to be able to do that, in fact, most people will not. But it is possible because it's a field where results speak for themselves. You need to be able to produce products that you can show your future potential employers.

The reason why this is possible is that the demand for developers has and probably will for a while, be higher than the supply. All of this is because this is hard. Learning how to code is hard. Coming up with a project idea and executing that idea from a blank screen to a working application is hard. Contributing to open source projects is hard. Feeling like you don't know anything after days, weeks, months of learning is exhausting.

But you can do it, and when you start learning you will never stop. Ask any Jr or Sr developers what their day looks like, and chances are most of them will tell you that a huge part of their day consists of googling things they can't figure out. Even for people who have been doing this for years, **it's still hard**.

You need to evaluate your decision. Why do you want to be a front-end developer? Money? Challenge? Fun? All of which are 100% legitimate reasons, money is a huge factor for a lot of people. The reason developers universally are paid very well is that it's hard. The beauty of coding, in my opinion, is that anyone can learn how to code. You don't need to be incredibly intelligent, you don't need to have an affinity for technology. You need to be disciplined and motivated, so whatever your reason is that prompted you to want to learn code. You need to ask yourself if that reason is good enough for you to always be learning.

You're on the right track though, keep consistently doing what you're doing and you'll be fine.

What's one album that you keep going back to no matter how old?

The Wall.

How long is the pastor at the royal wedding going to keep speaking for?

FOREVER! FOR LOVE IS FIRE, AND FIRE IS LOVE!

How do i tell scyfy i love the show and to keep it going strong?

Buy it through their various distribution channels. Your wallet is the best vote you have.

You can get it through Amazon, Google Play, and iTunes. Or watch it on cable when it airs.

So how long are we going to keep using the spoiler tags for this?

We can't stop people from spoiler tagging their own posts.

However, we have relaxed the spoiler tag rule and are no longer enforcing the tags.